Post by Ampersand on Sept 23, 2021 6:09:43 GMT
Darkness cloaks everything in the Colosseum, the only thing breaking the still blanket laid over the audience their own restless murmuring. The anticipation is palpable, a kind of electricity in the air that feels like the right move, the right word, could set off a spark to set the world on fire.
As Freddie Mercury’s vocals ring out across the Colosseum, a fan of multi-colored lasers ignite along the entrance ramp, their gritty intensity soon joined by gold pyros bursting at the top of the stage! Across the Big Screen, we see profiles of each member of the roster flash by in rapid succession!
We see Sherah and Adam Prince standing side by side with Bo Fletcher on the observation deck of the Space Needle, caught in the neon glow of the city at night. They gaze out with eager expressions across the city center; the MoPop, the Science Center, and Climate Pledge Arena spreading out around them. We flash to the International District, Chiba Suzumiya framed by the intricate lattice metal work dragon outside of the Uwajimaya, her mask glinting in the glow of the city night. Mara Lang stands in her office, bathed in the fluorescent luminescence of the overhead lights, before an anatomical chart of a neuron, skimming the tip of one finger up along the axon, nucleus, and dendrite.
The lines of the dendrites darken and extend, becoming roots running through a basement; or a pit. Gnarled fingers close around equally gnarled roots, yanking them free in a shower of soil and stone. As the camera pulls out, we see the back of Bill Woods, eerily still for a moment before turning his head, one eye gleaming with sinister intent from behind his mask. Following the roots once again, we’re taken upward to the surface where Frater Perdurabo stands shrouded in dark pines and moonlight like a fairytale monster lurking in the forest. We’re then with Amelia ‘Wildheart’ Winston being interviewed by Dave. Her eyes are bright, expression growing intense as she speaks; her focus and intent are singular and sharp. She is a woman on a mission.
We find ourselves in the stands of the Colosseum with WildStar. He adjusts his grip on his bag of gear as he surveys the ring and rigging being set up. One last ride. One last time to set things right. In the ring, running the ropes, is a young man whose own ride is just beginning. Kyle Beckett has everything to prove and the momentum to do it. He won’t lose it here. His footsteps echo louder across the canvas, taking on a different quality, and we’re taken to Davie O’Toole free running down the metallic slope of the ‘Black Lightning’ public art installation in the shadow of the Space Needle. It isn’t just a possible mark in the ‘L’ column he has to worry about. He may very well have put his freedom on the line. It’s a question of whether or not he can beat the man that now fills the screen. Roy Valentine paces down hallways of an ostentatious dwelling, peering with a smug expression into empty rooms and facilities that seem as though they are waiting for their occupant to arrive.
Standing in the shallows of Lake Washington just off Matthews Beach, Zephyr Quinn is bathed in starlight; the choppy water reflecting a moonlit shine that makes her look like she was wrought in silver. A lunatic angel. But the night holds dark as well as light, and we see it in the Lab Rat King as he skulks along the statue of the Troll under the Fremont Bridge. The glint in his eye isn’t the same anymore; it lacks the wild, leaping bonfire madness it once held. Instead, its gleam is hot, focused, and bright as an ember. Not that fire holds much power over Sebastian Hawke any longer, which he’s more than happy to demonstrate. LRK’s amber eye melts into the flame of a silver, flip-top lighter, the Insensate running his fingertips through it before setting a photo of Silvio Leon alight. He smirks, crumpling the smoldering image into his fist. As the bits of the photo crumble away, they become flecks of light that scatter across Silvio Leon’s face. He’s standing in gorilla position, just behind the entrance at the top of the ramp, gazing out at the crowd assembled in the Colosseum. He breathes deep, in and out, before glancing up and looking at the viewer. At first he blinks, surprised, then grins, giving the viewer a nod, the tiniest pause in the music so his voice can be heard as he says: “You ready?” Light swallows up his silhouette as the music kicks back in.
Pyros are firing and the crowd is positively roaring as the Colosseum comes back into focus. A few posters catch the eye as the view soars over the crowd.
Artemis Direction, Del Ramos, and Hiro Suzuki are seated at the commentary table. Artemis looks flawless in an elaborate rose-gold wig studded with stars, a glimmering gold dress hugging her curves, Hiro has cleaned up surprisingly well in a slate grey suit and navy tie, and even Del has put on a nice-looking long-sleeved black graphic tee with a complex heavy metal logo design emblazoned across it, accented with silver studs.
Artemis Direction: Welcome, Ascended Army, to Ascension! Ascended Wrestling’s first Pay-Per-View event! We have quite a show for you this evening!
Del grins.
Del Ramos: Do we ever. Gonna be the first time we award gold here, too.
Hiro Suzuki: And some exciting new talents are making their debut! Kicking things off on our first PPV match is Sherah Prince vs. Brick Hardcheese!
Artemis Direction: Mr. Prince is certainly quite the specimen, isn’t he? We work in an industry of exceptional bodies, and even among those, he is something truly unique!
Hiro Suzuki: Hey, did you hear about Dr. Frankenstein entering into a bodybuilding competition?
Del Ramos: If there was any justice in this world, when you give us the punchline to this ‘joke,’ a swarm of centipedes would escape your stupid fucking mouth instead.
Hiro Suzuki: Turns out he seriously misunderstood the objective!
Del Ramos: I swear one day I will see you eaten alive by insects from the inside out. Anyway, that Sherah guy’s fine, but he seems like one of those gentle giant types. Now the match after him? That has some promise for a little viciousness!
Artemis Direction: Chiba Suzumiya! What a little spitfire she is! Can’t wait to see her in action.
Hiro winces a little.
Hiro Suzuki: The next two fights...I’m not really sure I’m ready to see.
Del Ramos: You kidding? This whole show is a goddamn gift to an’ old blood letter like me. Not only do we have our first Underworld Championship match, but we get to see some monsters tearing it up! First we have Lang and The Pit. They’re both in it for the pain and I can’t wait to see what happens there.
Artemis Direction: The next fight...goodness gracious it’s quite the David and Goliath tale!
Del Ramos: I can’t wait to see more Frater in action. The way he came in with that fukken slasher movie monster energy was perfect.
Hiro Suzuki: Maybe, but I don’t think Amelia is going to be easily frightened or intimidated. She came out swinging in her debut and has made no bones about what her ambitions are.
Artemis Direction: And then we have a literal battle of the ages. Rookie upstart versus wily veteran! And Kyle has been so far undefeated here at Ascended.
Del Ramos: Guess we’re gonna see if the kid can keep his streak running.
Hiro Suzuki: The next fight is going to be our first title awarded to an Ascended Gladiator.
Artemis Direction: The Emerald City Championship! Roy Valentine and David O’Toole are getting their rematch from Collision #3 when they fought each other to a draw!
Del Ramos: Both of them have shown the Ascended Army they can throw down when necessary, putting on some brutal matches in the past few weeks.
Hiro Suzuki: But there’s another wrinkle in that match - something else on the line. Valentine was offering O’Toole a contract of some kind, and from the sounds of it, it’s a bad deal. O’Toole had really better hope he pulls a win out of this one, or he might end up as nothing more than Valentine’s indentured servant.
Del Ramos: Then we have the meal I been lookin’ forward to all year. Quinn vs. King.
Their eyes are bright, their smile broad.
Del Ramos: I can’t think of a single thing I want more in this world than seeing those two going at it!
Artemis Direction: And it’s an Underworld rules match, which means no disqualifications. Weaponry can be used, falls count anywhere, the sky’s the limit. And we know how violent both Ms. Quinn and Mr. Rat can be individually, darlings. Putting them together? Why, the city might not survive!
Hiro Suzuki: Well they better leave something for our main event match to fight on. We’re about to see the culmination of a bitter fight between Silvio Leon and Sebastian Hawke.
Artemis Direction: Oh, my poor child. He had no idea…
Del Ramos: Seems like Hawke doesn’t give a shit. He was abducted by Lang and… had Satan only knows what done to him.
Hiro Suzuki: Whatever it was made him able to control when he feels pain.
Artemis Direction: Evidently it was a traumatizing experience and Sebastian places the blame squarely on Silvio’s shoulders for not being there to save him from it.
Del Ramos: What good is a hero if he can’t even save his closest friends?
Artemis Direction: How can you fix something if you don’t know it’s broken?
Hiro holds up his hands.
Hiro Suzuki: Whatever the outcome is, one man will walk away from that ring as the first Ascended Wrestling World Champion.
Artemis Direction: Everything is on the line this show. Our victors and vanquished are going to determine the direction of this company.
Del Ramos: Don’t forget - we still need contenders for the tag belts.
Hiro Suzuki: Yeah! I wonder who’s going to pioneer our tag division? We just signed on a new Gladiator, Eleni Tolis, who will be competing in our next edition of Collision!
Artemis Direction: I’m positively atwitter with anticipation, dear heart!
Back in the ring, Kevin Kim, looking dapper in a tux, has the mic.
Kevin Kim: Ascended Army, welcome to your first ever Ascended Wrestling Pay-Per-View - Ascension!
The Ascended Army roars in response, the sound feeling not so much that it’s coming from the people as it is the building’s own voice speaking.
Kevin Kim: This evening the first ever Ascended championships will be awarded! You will have your inaugural Ascended Emerald City, Underworld, and World Champions!
Cheers rise from the crowd, posters catching the eye of the viewer.
Kevin Kim: And now fighting in your first ever Ascended Wrestling Pay-Per-View, we have now coming to the ring!
"Warriors" by Aaliyah Rose begins to play over the PA system and yellow lights strobe and pulse to the beat as the Princes of Power, "Adorable" Adam and "Iron Man" Sherah Prince, and their manager, "Beautiful" Bo Fletcher, step out onto the stage.
Kevin Kim: From Etherton Illinois, weighing in at 293 lbs, he is the “Iron Man,” SHERAH PRINCE!
Adam bounces and dances to the music for a moment, showboating for the crowd, before the trio make their way down the aisle. Upon reaching the ring, Sherah climbs the stairs and continues up the outside of the turnbuckles while Adam slides into the ring and ascends the ropes on the opposite side. The two of them look out over the audience, pointing at the fans and pumping their fists in the air.
Kevin Kim: And his opponent, BRICK HARDCHEESE!
Where Brick had once been flexing his muscles and stretching to psyche up for the match, with one look at the impressive physique of Sherah, his face falls dramatically.
Del Ramos: Ha! Taking his identity as the biggest guy in the room. Fucking brutal.
The match is underway and Sherah motions to Brick, challenging him to a test of strength. To his credit the local doesn't back down. The two competitors lock up. Almost effortlessly, Iron Man has Brick down to his knees!
Artemis Direction: Oooh...I don't think Hardcheese was expecting to be that overwhelmed!
Hiro Suzuki: I think he knee-ded to be better prepared for that!
Del Ramos: Heh! I don't think the big guy's gonna let this be much of a contest.
Sherah shifts his grip, grasping Brick in a clinch around the waist and throwing him bodily to the mat with a ring-shaking gutwrench suplex. The Iron Man flexes while his compatriots, ‘Beautiful’ Bob Fletcher and ‘Adorable’ Adam Prince, clap in appreciation. Sherah lifts Brick to his feet, only to knock him down again with a powerful short-arm lariat. Lateral press for the pin!
1…
2…
To his credit Brick Hardcheese manages to get a shoulder up.
Artemis Direction: Sherah almost took off poor Brick head off with that lariat!
Del Ramos: Yet somehow he’s still in the fight.
The Iron Man shakes his head at his opponent’s resistance then punishes him for it with a standing elbow drop! Or at least would have if Brick hadn’t managed to roll out of the way. Sherah is jarred by the impact with the ring mat, giving Brick a chance to press the advantage! He knocks Sherah Prince back with an European uppercut. Then comes charging in off the ropes for a running European uppercut. Not wanting to be outshone, Brick tenses up, readying for a spectacular display of strength and grapples his opponent for a vertical suplex.
Hiro Suzuki: He's going for it!
Sherah Prince remains firm and denies Brick Hardcheese the suplex. He strikes Brick on the crown with a knee strike! Then a second! And a third! The Iron Man lifts his opponent up into the air, holding him up with one arm and flexing again with the other. A few moments pass with Brick hanging helplessly before Sherah mercifully opts to complete his own vertical suplex. The Iron Man doesn't let up, keeping a hold of Brick to force him to his feet and give him a shove. Brick stumbles backwards into a corner.
Del Ramos: Sherah Prince is practically throwing Brick Hardcheese around like a ragdoll! Heh! Maybe this guy knows how to party after all.
The Iron Man lunges forward, gut checking Brick with a shoulder charge. Hardcheese doubles over. Sherah hoists up his opponent, draping him across his back and carrying him! The Iron Man climbs the turnbuckle and the Tide Turner connects! Sherah turned to lock eyes with his manager. Bob Fletcher responds with a solemn nod of anticipation. The message is clear. It's time to end the match.
Artemis Direction: Prince has been absolutely unrelenting throughout this match!
Hiro Suzuki: Jeez...seeing somebody like him really makes you wanna hit the gym. Did you hear about the priests that started a work-out club?
Artemis Direction: No, sweetling, tell me about it.
Hiro Suzuki: They have a lot of muscle mass!
Sherah has Brick on his feet once again. Brick crumples, unable to support himself under his own power and would have slumped back to the mat if not for Sherah holding him up in position for a powerbomb. The Iron Man hit his sickening WMD and hooked the leg for the pin.
1…
2…
3…
Kevin Kim: Your winner by pinfall, the Iron Man, SHERAH PRINCE!
As Sherah’s hand is lifted in victory, Bo and Adam come into the ring to celebrate with him. His first victory is one for all of them.
Del Ramos: That was a lot more brutal than I was expecting. Heh! Can’t wait to see how his cousin is in the ring. Maybe that killer instinct runs in the family.
Artemis Direction: My guess is we’ll find that out come our next edition of Collision! So many new faces to look forward to!
Hiro Suzuki: Speaking of, we have another of our latest signees in our next match!
Kevin Kim: Ascended Army our next match is scheduled for one fall!
Le chant de Roma begins to play.
Kevin Kim: Making their way to the ring, weighing in 99lbs, from Tokyo, Japan, she is CHIBA SUZUMIYA!
The whole arena's lights go out as the music gradually grows. Purple lights gradually light up the arena. Chiba appears with outstretched arms before slowly looking up at the ring with determined eyes. She put her hands down and walked straight for the ring, ignoring the audience. Chiba climbs into the ring and mounts a turnbuckle, throwing her arms out wide. Confidence is clear upon her face. She shoot a glance at Hot Dropkick already waiting in the ring and hops down to prepare for the match.
Del Ramos: Here we go! In her promo, Chiba made it clear that she wants to tear apart the old world and make a new one in its ashes. That's fucking metal as Hell and I can totally get behind it.
The starting bell has barely finished ringing when Chiba Suzumiya lashes out with a quick first strike! She rushes forward and clocks Hot Dropkick with a stiff Superman punch! The homegrown Ascended talent stumbles, rocked by the sudden attack, into a nearby corner. An Irish whip sends Hot Dropkick careening toward the opposing corner. Chiba follows in pursuit, barely a step behind. By instinct Dropkick reacts, swinging his elbow and catching his opponent in the jaw. Caught off guard, Chiba stumbles back a few steps, giving Hot Dropkick some necessary space and separation.
Artemis Direction: Hot Dropkick is looking to make himself quite the Hot Topic with a win at our first ever Pay-Pay-View!
Del Ramos: I'll believe it when I see it.
Hot Dropkick jumps onto the middle turnbuckle, coming down upon Chiba with a diving double axe handle. The quicker by no small measure Chiba takes the wind out of Dropkick with another stiff strike, this one a roundhouse kick to the gut. Hot Dropkick collapses to his knees. Chiba bounces off the ring ropes, performing a picture perfect handspring and brings her knee down across the back of Dropkick’s head. She hooks the leg for the pin!
1…
2..
Dropkick kicks out!
Del Ramos: I’m not convinced our best could withstand Chiba’s offense. Such speed!
Hiro Suzuki: That reminds me of a movie I saw about a bus that had to speed around a city, keeping its speed over fifty, and if its speed dropped, it would explode! I think it was called ''The Bus That Couldn't Slow Down”.
Artemis Direction: You’re an idiot. Don’t worry folks if you don’t see Hiro back next time it’s because he’s been sued by Fox for copyright.
As Hot Dropkick tries to recover, Chiba brings the boot down, literally, with an axe kick, once more to the back of her opponent’s head! However, she opts not to attempt another pin, instead taking position in the corner. She crouches and waits patiently for the perfect moment to strike. She doesn't have to wait long as Hot Dropkick stirs and slowly climbs back to his feet. Chiba Suzumiya with the Last Call! But no! Dropkick blocks the superkick and catches the opponent by the boot. He spins Chiba around then takes her down with a desperate lariat.
Del Ramos: The first sign of true life from Hot Dropkick this whole match. Fukken poser.
Dropkick crawls over Chiba for a weak pin attempt.
1…
2..
Chiba easily kicks out!
The two battling competitors ascend to a standing position! Dropkick strikes first with a wild right hand swing! Chiba ducks underneath, charging against the ropes to gain momentum for another handspring. She catches the shocked Dropkick, too slow to muster up a defence, with an impressive Pele kick! Chiba climbs to the very top of the nearest corner post, where she waits once more.
Hiro Suzuki: Dropkick has been spending ALOT of this match on your back. You don’t win on your back.
Artemis Direction: Well…
Del Ramos: Oh get a room you too!
Artemis Direction: Oh, please, Hiro wishes.
Hiro Suzuki: Hey!
Artemis Direction: Let's be honest, sweetling, you couldn't afford me and I'm so far out of your league we're not even playing the same sport.
Hiro Suzuki: ...Well yeah, but hey!
Chiba leaps into the air, catching Hot Dropkick on her descent with Into the Darkness! Dropkick is rocked by the diving stunner but Chiba maintains her grip around the neck of her opponent. She rolls through, twisting Dropkick around and flowing perfectly into her patented Fade Out! The sleeper is applied almost dead centre of the ring, Hot Dropkick has nowhere to go! Nor does it look as if he has any fight left to resist. Referee Godrick Smith is there in a flash to check up on Dropkick. He lifts Dropkick’s arm and let go.
It flops back down once…
Twice…
Aaaaaaaand….thrice!
Godric Smith calls for the bell! Hot Dropkick is unable to continue! This match was over!
Kevin Kim: Your winner by submission, CHIBA SUZUMIYA!
Del Ramos: That is what I am fucking talking about!
Del is grinning with manic delight, eyes bright.
Del Ramos: That girl gets it! If that’s what she wants to bring with her revolution I’m on board!
Hiro Suzuki: This has been an exciting start to our show!
Artemis Direction: Oh, agreed! Our new talent are certainly showing their chops! I can’t wait to see them in action again! We have another fresh face...or mask...in the Colosseum fighting against Mara Lang in our next match-up!
Del Ramos: Heh. I love this kinda brutality.
Hiro squirms in his seat.
Hiro Suzuki: Considering the beating The Pit took last show, I’m kind of surprised to see him having a match with such a short turn around time…
Del Ramos: That fucker’s inhuman. I wanna see him smash it up with Quinn or Frater next! That’d make for some matches worth watching!
Kevin Kim: Ascended Army your next match is scheduled for one fall! Entering the ring first! Weighing in at 185 pounds from Bellevue, Washington, she is MARA LANG!
The arena big screen comes to life with what looks like a network of nerves branching out in silvery spikes, electrical impulses crackling through them along to the strains of, ‘Twisted Nerve,’ by Bernard Herrmann. Those impulses form the name, ‘Mara Lang,’ in shivering silver letters before they burst into brilliant sparks. The lights on either side of the entrance rotate, flashing white beams in an almost hypnotic pattern as Mara steps through to the top of the ramp. As the sharp whistling sound of Mara’s entrance music cuts through the air, the crowd is quieter than would be expected. There is something unwholesome about the way she strides to the ring, not a motion wasted. The only thing that would suggest any distraction from her destination is the motion of her eyes; casting back and forth among the assembled as if assessing them. She climbs into the ring and stands at the ready, arms crossed loosely behind her back.
Kevin Kim: And her opponent!
The lights go out in the arena as "Sail" by Jack Trammell begins playing over the PA system. A single strobe light shines down as Bill Woods is raised from a platform below the entrance stage to the entrance ramp. Bill stands at the top of the entrance ramp in his wrestling gear, his head lowered, a large towel covering his face. Bill's left hand fidgets and twitches nervously, and in his right hand he's holding a nightmarish mask. He appears to be talking to himself, and several times his left hand flashes upward and he hits himself in the face, nearly knocking the towel off each time.
Kevin Kim: From Houston, Texas, weighing in at 267 lbs, he is Bill Woods, THE PIT!
As "Sail" reaches the forty-second mark and the bass drops, Bill dramatically flings the towel off of his head and puts on his mask, screaming at the top of his lungs to herald the arrival of "The Pit". Bill runs to the ring maniacally, his movements becoming jerky and unpredictable before clambering inside to meet his opponent.
The pair begin circling one another like wolves, Mara practically gliding along the canvas, the Pit menacing her with little half-lunges that don’t phase the scientist at all. In fact, watching carefully, she waits for him to try for another and rewards him with a lightning quick knee to the chin! The Pit fumbles backward, Mara following him with a back hand chop across the chest, and going for a super kick directly after! Her opponent momentarily staggered, Lang catches hold of The Pit’s arm and, with tremendous effort, Irish whips him into the ropes! As he rebounds back at Mara, she hits the monster with a discus back elbow that sends him to his knees!
Artemis Direction: Mara’s seen what the Pit is capable of and seems eager to shut him down before he can get any momentum going!
Del Ramos: Ohhh it’s gonna take a lot more than that to keep this maniac on the mat.
Hiro Suzuki: This guy’s straight out of a horror movie! You know, I’ve taken to reading books by braille lately and I have a horror title I just started.
Artemis Direction: Have you now?
Hiro Suzuki: Yeah! Something bad’s gonna happen soon, I can just feel it!
Del Ramos: Did those stagehands at Unexpected Productions ease off on the threat of dropping the stagelight on you if you ever tried performing there again?
Hiro Suzuki: I haven’t checked back recently.
Del Ramos: Maybe you should do a set just to see if they’ve changed their minds.
Hiro Suzuki: Del, it is so nice to hear you encouraging me to get back on the horse!
Del Ramos: Just like, let me know when you’re going to do it so I can bring a camera and a rain jacket for my front row seat. Shit’ll be like a Gallagher show.
Hiro Suzuki: What makes you say that?
Del Ramos: Nothing. Heh! Looks like Lang’s in trouble…
The Pit’s frame shakes and shudders in the ring, Mara watching him closely, as if observing an especially fascinating specimen. But as the moments pass, it’s clear he’s not shaking in pain, but in laughter. He whips his head back in a shower of dreadlocks, his eyes glowering out at Lang from behind the mask. There is a distinct impression that he is smiling. With a thunderous bellow, he surges back to his feet and lays Mara out with a lariat! The wind knocked from her, Lang gasps, trying to get her bearings only for her masked opponent to drag her to her feet, swinging her around and securing his arms around her waist to send her crashing to the canvas again in a German suplex!
The Pit goes for the pin, Jill Kincaid sliding in to make the count!
1!
2--
Kick out from Lang!
Del Ramos: What’d I tell you? It’s gonna take a lot to pull off a win against Woods!
Artemis Direction: He had that nightmarish debut and followed it up with an extremely violent bout with the Lab Rat King and is still able to walk unassisted, so I’d say you’re correct, Del!
Hiro Suzuki: Don’t count out Lang just yet!
With a grimace, Mara’s hands move like striking vipers, thumbs jamming through the mask into Woods’ eyes!
Artemis and Hiro let out yelps, Suzuki quickly covering his own eyes in sympathetic pain! Del, on the other hand, is howling with delight.
Letting out a guttural cry, The Pit pulls himself backward, using the nearby turnbuckle to help him get to his feet again, momentarily blinded. Taking advantage, Mara gets to her feet and executes a swift super kick to Woods’ jaw! His head snaps backward, the rest of him unnervingly still. Seizing the top of his mask and a handful of hair, Mara yanks his head forward again into her elbow before climbing onto the second rope and slamming into the top of The Pit’s head with an overhead chop!
Artemis Direction: Lang on the offense again! She does not want him to get another shot in!
Del Ramos: She might be worried about the wrong thing, then…
Before Mara can get in another shot, The Pit folds his arms around her waist and steps forward, lifting her clean off the second ropes! In an astonishing show of strength, he flips Mara around in mid-air as if she weighs no more than a feather, before punishing her with a brutal power slam!
Artemis Direction: Oh my stars and garters!
For a moment, Woods crouches beside Mara, watching her hazy expression in fascination before she climbs back to her feet. Eyeing him, Lang starts to go for a European uppercut when Woods grabs her arm and whips her into the ropes! He hits her with a Big Boot on her way back, sending her sprawling to the canvas and rolling out under the bottom rope onto the mats outside of the ring! Undeterred, he follows his prey, moving out of the ring as Jill begins a ten count!
Del Ramos: Lang better not be looking to get any recuperation time. Our monster there’s got murder on his mind.
Mara rises to her feet a bit unsteadily, though she quickly clears the cobwebs, backing away from The Pit as he pursues her. Not looking away, she moves cautiously, Woods continuing to follow as Lang puts the steel ring steps between them. He lunges at her with a snarl, but she avoids his grasp and, moving quickly, grips the back of his head, slamming his face into the topmost steel step! Though the mask saves him from being busted open, The Pit is dazed as he collapses to the outside mats, Mara escaping back to the ring. Jill continues to count!
...5!
...6!
...7!
Artemis Direction: As disappointing as a count-out win would be, I don’t think Lang could pull Woods back into the ring even if she wanted to.
Hiro Suzuki: Looks like that’s not going to be a problem!
As if pulled upward by some invisible thread, The Pit rises from his heap on the floor with more grace than would seem possible for a man that size who had just had his head slammed into an unforgiving steel step. Jill almost falters in her count when Woods’ hand slams down on the apron with an audible ‘THUD,’ and he pulls himself back up into the ring.
Artemis Direction: This... does not look good for Mara…
Lang seems to recognize this and, eyes narrowing, decides to go for the kill! Taking a few steps forward, she draws back her hand and looks to go for the Novocaine, aiming directly at the opening in the mask just over Woods’ mouth! Instantly, The Pit’s hand snaps up, grabs Mara’s arm, and he yanks her close, throwing one of her arms over his shoulder while the other grabs her waistband! He hawls her off her feet, lifting her, inverted, into the air before dropping her headfirst into the mat between his legs as he does a sit-out onto the canvas! Lang collapses limply to the mat.
Hiro Suzuki: He calls that one, Embrace the Darkness!
Artemis Direction: Woods goes for the cover!
1!
2!
3!
Kevin Kim: Your winner by pinfall, Bill Woods, THE PIT!
Del cackles with delight.
Del Ramos: Looks like The Pit found some serious motivation from that loss he took to LRK!
Hiro Suzuki: Jeez, I’ll say!
Artemis Direction: Ascended Army, I’m getting news of something going on in the backstage area!
??: Hey, camera guy!
We open backstage, a camera pointed at the floor, bouncing slightly in time with the sound of footsteps; one of the cameramen seems to have forgotten to shut his camera off as he moves from filming one behind-the-scenes moment to another and, from the sound of the voice addressing him, has stumbled across Amelia ‘Wildheart’ Winston!
Amelia Winston: “Hey, put that camera on me for a minute, okay? I just got some stuff to say, won’t take long. Don’t give me that look, if they ask what delayed you say I threatened to kick your butt. Don’t worry, I won’t actually do it though.”
The camera pans up a second later, floor then boots and kickpads then up the legs and torso of Amelia, dressed to compete. She has a finger raised as she finishes chugging back an energy drink before setting the empty can on an equipment crate next to her.
Amelia Winston: Ladies and gentlemen, it is Saturday night, we are here to fight and baby, Wildheart is ready to take flight!
Winston is all grins as she looks into the camera, bouncing on the balls of her feet a little, a bundle of excited energy.
Amelia Winston: It’s Ascended Wrestling’s pay-per-view debut, it’s my personal pay-per-view debut and you know I’ve always believed in the value of good first impressions. So first time at the real big time, I am gonna go big. Fuckin’. Time. How big?
She shrugs a little.
Amelia Winston: Six foot nine, three thirty-six? That’s big and I am more than ready. Frater is gonna be flatter than a pancake, Perdurabo will be Per-done-bo when I hit that Wild At Heart and get my hand raised after getting that 1-2-3.
Amelia leans in, still grinning into the camera.
Amelia Winston: Get ready for some fun, wrestling fans. And trainers, get the ice bags ready ‘cause momma’s gonna need a few after this one. But hey, it all hurts less when you get the W, right?
Amelia shoots the camera a wink before turning around, scooping up her empty drink can and strutting off down the hallway as we fade out.
Amelia Winston: I have had too much caffeine tonight! Let’s fucking go!!!
The house lights dim.
The unrelenting introduction of "The Heaviest Matter of the Universe" is accompanied by strobes flashing in time with the drums as Frater Perdurabo emerges onto the stage.
Kevin Kim: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing from Cefalù, Sicily, weighing in at 336 pounds, he is ‘Necesse Malum,’ FRATER PERDURABO!
Frater wastes no time heading down the ramp and stops once he reaches ringside. He reaches up, takes hold of the ropes, hauls his frame up onto the apron, then climbs over the top rope. Once in the ring, Frater heads to the opposite end and paces back and forth between the corners as the building's lighting returns to normal.
Del is grinning broadly.
Del Ramos: I've been looking forward to seeing this guy in action again. After that debut, I've been craving the next match.
Hiro shakes his head.
Hiro Suzuki: Speak for yourself! When I saw this on the card, it made my stomach turn!
Artemis Direction: Say what you will, but I think Frater'd better be careful. This young lioness has some claws of her own.
The lights dim, strobing along with the intro of "Black Sheep", Amelia standing at the top of the entrance ramp, bouncing a little on the balls of her feet.
Kevin Kim: And his opponent, hailing from Belleville, Ontario, Canada, weighing in at 157 lbs, she is AMELIA “WILDHEART” WINSTON!
The first verse hits and the lights come up brighter, still strobing a bit with the tune as she makes her way down to the ring, a bit of strut in her march. She sprints the last few yards, diving in under the bottom rope and rolling to her feet, climbing onto the ropes to cut a pose for the hard camera as the lights come back to full normal before jumping down from the ropes, eyes locking on those of Frater Perdurabo.
Amelia circles warily as Frater stands in the middle of the ring, staring the smaller competitor down as if daring her to make a move. Finally she feints moving in for a lockup, ducking under the arms of Frater as he moves to engage her, turning and connecting with a pair of hard round kicks to his left thigh before stepping back as Frater turns to face her again. Frater throws a big right hand but Amelia dodges before landing another pair of hard leg kicks. She looks for a third but this time Frater catches her foot, holding her leg with one arm, grabbing her by the hair with the other and tossing her back-first into the corner.
Artemis Direction: A valiant effort from Amelia!
Del Ramos: That's the problem here, isn't it? Wildheart has to hit and dodge consistently. She has to be perfect every time. Frater? Heh. He only needs to catch her once.
Frater rushes in, looking for a clothesline but Amelia sidesteps, Frater crashing hard into the buckles. Amelia goes back to the leg, hammering it with round kicks while Frater gets turned around, grabbing her and turning, biel throwing her across the ring, the smaller wrestler launched halfway across the ring! Amelia scrambles to her feet against the ropes, a little shaken, just in time to get met with a massive shoulder block from Frater that sends her toppling out over the top to the floor, rolling backwards til she’s almost at the base of the entrance ramp!
Hiro Suzuki: You know, I always try to remember it isn't how many times you fall down - it's how many times you get up! Unfortunately, I ran into someone recently who didn't agree with that philosophy.
Artemis Direction: Really, dearest?
Hiro Suzuki: Yeah, the cop told me field sobriety tests don't work like that.
Amelia pulls herself back up to her feet as Frater rolls out of the ring after her, starting to favour his left leg just a little. Frater grabs Amelia but she hits a quick jawbreaker, jamming the top of her own head under his and pulling him down as she hits her knees, staggering the big man back a few steps. Amelia hops up to the ring apron, glancing back to measure Frater before leaping to the second rope and launching herself backwards for an Asai moonsault but Frater catches her, pausing for a second to say something to her, a vicious smile on his face before hitting a huge fallaway slam on the floor! Frater stands up, taking a long moment to admire his handiwork as Amelia writhes in pain on the ground.
Hiro hisses through his teeth, brow knit. Artemis lets out a low, 'Ooooo...'. Del cackles and slams a hand down on the top of the commentator's desk.
Del Ramos: Let's see some more of that pain, Frater!
Artemis Direction: Winston is showing remarkable resiliency!
As Amelia begins to pull herself to her feet again, Frater steps in, grabbing a handful of hair and the waist of her trunks, tossing her bodily into the ring, Amelia rolling towards a corner as Frater climbs back in as well, watching her from the opposite corner, measuring her as she pulls herself up. He charges, looking for the Dark Depths but at the last second Amelia goes low, dropkicking his left leg out from under him as he brings the right up for the attempted big boot! Frater goes down hard and Amelia pounces, grabbing his left arm and twisting it around her leg before rolling over him, taking the big man over with a la magistral cradle!
Artemis Direction: Well now! Wildheart said speed kills, and she may just prove it here and now!
ONE!
TW--KICKOUT!
Frater kicks out with authority, sending Amelia scrambling away. As Frater rises Amelia grabs him from behind, gripping his right wrist with her left hand and pulling the big man around, looking for a ripcord knee but Frater counters, blocking the knee with the forearm of his free hand before gripping her by the throat! He hauls her up, looking for the Culling Of The Weak but Amelia pushes off of him with her feet on his chest in mid-air! She lands on the mat, back somersaulting to her feet before leaping at Frater for a huricanrana but he blocks, using his weight and strength advantage to keep himself from flipping over, holding Amelia upside down for a brief moment before hauling her back upright and slamming her to the mat with a huge powerbomb! Frater drops into the cover!
ONE!
TWO!
THR-KICKOUT!
The audience begins a chant of, 'WILD-HEART! WILD-HEART!' as Frater is narrowly denied a pinfall!
Amelia barely rolls her shoulder up, Godric Smith earning a glare of disapproval from Frater before the big man turns his attention back to Amelia, using a handful of hair to haul her back to her feet. He grabs her by the throat again but this time Amelia uses both arms to break the grip, slamming her forearms down on his, then grabs a Muay Thai clinch and starts to hammer rapid-fire knees into the head of Frater, letting out an almost animalistic yell as she does so! After a long moment Frater is able to push her back, both taking a moment to recover. Both rush each other at the same time, Frater throwing a clothesline that Amelia ducks before she leaps to the second rope, launching herself and surprising Frater with a flying armdrag that sends him rolling across the ring towards a corner. Amelia follows up with a running dropkick that staggers the big man back into the buckles. Amelia then runs up behind him, grappling Frater in an inverted facelock before spinning out with him, twisting in midair to drive him to the mat with her elbow across his jaw, connecting with a tornado version of the Marie Antoinette Special! Amelia moves into the cover, getting all her weight across the chest and shoulders of Frater.
Artemis Direction: Good heavens! We may have our winner!
Del Ramos: Fukken ballistic moves! But I don't think our murderous friend here has had enough yet.
ONE!
TWO!
TH-KICKOUT!
Amelia looks at Godric with a bit of shock on her face as Frater muscles a shoulder off the mat before turning her focus back to the big man. As Frater rolls over and pushes himself up to his hands and knees, Amelia slides in, wrapping her arms and a leg around his neck and locking in the Koji Clutch! Frater struggles before getting his free arm and knees under him, starting to push himself up as Amelia clings frantically to the hold, trying to choke the big man out but he muscles all the way up to his feet before slamming Amelia hard to the mat, breaking the hold!
Hiro Suzuki: Hey that reminds me! You know what you call a gorilla in a bad mood?
Artemis Direction: No, sweetheart, what?
Hiro Suzuki: Sir.
Both competitors roll away from each other, slow to reach their feet, Frater up half a heartbeat faster and takes advantage of that, charging and nailing Amelia with Dark Depths, the kick sending Amelia back into the ropes and as she bounces off of them Frater steps behind her, locking on The Mouth Of Madness on his standing opponent! Amelia reaches for the ropes before, in desperation, swinging both feet backwards overhead, catching Frater square in the nose with an overhead kick, causing him to release the hold. Amelia scrambles to her feet and grabs him by the wrist, spinning him out directly into a knee strike that catches him again in the nose, followed with a huge leaping Fameasser!
The crowd is on its feet, roaring its approval!
Amelia takes the briefest of glances to spot where Frater is down in the ring as he rolls to his back before quickly scaling the ropes, glancing down to the big man for just a second before launching herself, connecting with the Wild At Heart 630 senton! Amelia flips over, again pressing all of her weight down across the chest and shoulders of Frater as the referee counts.
ONE!
TWO!
THREE!
Kevin Kim: Your winner via pinfall, AMELIA “WILDHEART” WINSTON!
Amelia’s hand is raised in victory and the crowd is going absolutely banana!
Artemis Direction: Unbelievable work from both our competitors!
Del Ramos: Did you fucking see the kind of brutality Frater’s capable of? I’ve gotta watch more of that guy.
Hiro looks wan.
Hiro Suzuki: I can’t imagine he’s going to come out of this anything other than determined to show he’s not a monster to be tossed aside.
Del Ramos: Exactly. His next match’ll be a fukken bloodbath!
Artemis Direction: Well our next match of the night certainly promises to be an interesting one!
Hiro Suzuki: The rookie versus the veteran! Beckett has been enjoying a streak of wins so far. Do you think WildStar will finally be the one to break it?
Del rumbles thoughtfully.
Del Ramos: Hard to say. They’ve both got ideological motivations to get this win. WildStar wants to show he can succeed in this business clean and set a good example for his kid. Beckett’s just breaking into the business and has a lot to prove to the fans, his family, and himself. They’re both hungry - just a matter of seeing who has the sharper teeth.
Kevin Kim: The following match is set for one fall! Introducing first!
As REM’s Superman hits, the arena big screen lights up with a highlight reel of wrestling clips, all displaying a dark-haired man as he appears to work across multiple decades, accruing accolades along his journey.
Kevin Kim: From Wilmington, Delaware weighing in at 225 lbs, he is WILDSTAR!
WildStar slowly walks out and scans the audience. He wears a European singlet with a Jane’s Addiction logo printed across the front. Picking up the pace, he slaps high fives with fans on his way to the ring, even pausing to give a fist bump to a kid in an oversized shirt with his face printed across it. He climbs between the second and third ropes, does a judo roll, and then stretches by placing one foot on the top rope before alternating to the other.
Kevin Kim: And his opponent!
'Stick To Your Guns,' by the Sick Puppies comes on over the sound system and Kyle stands at the top of the entrance ramp, bent slightly forward and arms crossed. He drops the hood of his jacket and throws his arms out wide, letting out an excited roar to the crowd. He looks around to take in the arena before striding down the ramp.
Kevin Kim: From Brisbane, Australia weighing in at 201 pounds, he is the ‘Culture Clash,’ KYLE BECKETT!
Kyle ascends on to the ring apron, looking out to the arena again with a sly grin on his face and climbs to the top of the turnbuckle where he cries out ‘Aussie, Aussie, Aussie!,’ to which the crowd responds, ‘Oi, Oi, Oi!’ before leaping down to the ring and preparing himself for the match.
Hiro Suzuki: Hey! You know, Mara mentioned ‘Echidna’ in her promo. I found out they’re another Australian animal! They’re super cute, too! They have funny noses and big front feet and they’re all spiny like a hedgehog.
Del just looks at Hiro and grins.
Del Ramos: Hey, you wanna know something else about echidnas?
Hiro looks puzzled when Del motions for him to lean. They whisper something in his ear, and Hiro jerks back with a look of horror.
Hiro Suzuki: They have how many?!
Del Ramos: Well, technically only two of them are used during mating, so--
Hiro Suzuki: Stop! Stop making me know this! I hate that I know what I do now!
WildStar meets Kyle in the center of the ring, extending his hand for a shake. Beckett hesitates, but acquiesces, eyeing the veteran the entire time. The two step apart and begin pacing around each other, both looking for the first opening. Beckett moves first, locking up with WildStar! The pair begin chain wrestling, rapidly trading holds as neither gives an inch on the canvas! When they finally break apart, WildStar grins, turning to the crowd and gesturing to Beckett with an expression of admiration. Kyle gives an exaggerated, ‘aw, shucks!’ that masks the way he’s moving his arms. Before WildStar can do anything, the younger wrestler has twisted him around, one arm over his neck, and slammed him into the canvas with a Bulldog!
Del Ramos: HA! That kid’s wily!
Artemis Direction: You know, he was a bit uncertain at first, but lately we’ve really seen his personality shining through in the ring.
Hiro Suzuki: He shouldn’t get too cocky. WildStar has a history of dirty deeds in the ring, and his overall experience as a wrestler can’t be ignored.
As if he heard Hiro, once Kyle comes closer to WildStar, it seems like that Bulldog didn’t quite ring his bell as hard as Beckett expected! The vet sweeps Kyle’s legs out from under him, sending him to the mat! Once they’re on a level playing field, WildStar swiftly locks in a crossface! Beckett lets out a muffled cry, squirming in a panic and pain before gathering his wits and clawing his way to the nearest rope! He grips it, causing Jill to break up the submission, but as Kyle uses the ropes to help climb to his feet again, WildStar’s right there with him. Beckett turns just in time to catch a spinning backfist that sends him toppling over the top rope, spilling onto the outside mats!
Hiro Suzuki: Shouldn’t he have said, ‘timber!’ first? Hey, how do you tell if a lumberjack is lousy?
Del Ramos: They haven’t buried their axe into your skull yet?
Hiro Suzuki: They make a lot of axeidents!
WildStar follows Beckett out of the ring, dragging him back to his feet and pushing him back under the bottom rope. As WildStar re-enters the ring, he hasn’t noticed Kyle gather his legs up beneath him, and before he knows it, the younger fighter has rocketed upward, nailing him with a European uppercut! WildStar staggers dazedly, but remains standing and Beckett wastes no time running at the vet, popping up, and hitting him with a patented Beckett Cyclone-rana! Seated on WildStar’s chest, he reaches back to grab his legs, holding his shoulders down for a pin!
Jill Kincaid slides in for the count!
1!
2!
With herculean effort, WildStar leverages his arms beneath him and pushes himself upward, this time slamming Kyle’s shoulders onto the mat!
1!
2!
Kick out from Beckett!
Artemis fans herself, tossing her blonde mane.
Artemis Direction: My oh my! This is getting heated!
The two fighters climb to their feet again, each of them a little more gingerly than they did before. WildStar is just a little quicker, moving just behind Kyle, ducking under one of his arms, and hitting him with an Angle Slam! Flattened on the canvas, Beckett is groaning in pain and in no position to defend himself as WildStar ascends the nearest turnbuckle and executes a phenomenal Five Star Frog Splash! The crowd is on its feet, screaming for more as WildStar hooks the legs for a pin!
Del Ramos: I think Beckett’s all done here.
1!
2!
Jill’s hand a hair’s breadth away from the canvas, Kyle rolls one shoulder up!
WildStar rocks back onto his heels, gaping at Kyle and then Jill, who assures him, yes, that was two. Shaking his head, he starts hauling the younger man to his feet, starting to sweep him up into a GTS only for Kyle to thrash free, landing behind WildStar with one arm curled around his neck before bringing him down with an Inverted Headlock Backbreaker!
Hiro Suzuki: Break the Cycle!
The recoil is such that WildStar practically springs back to his feet, body stiff before toppling back to the mat! Climbing agonizingly to his feet, Kyle grimaces, expression determined as he limps over to WildStar and drags him to the nearest turnbuckle, hanging him up by his arms on the top rope. Seeming to find some well of resolve inside of him, he evens his stride, going to the opposite turnbuckle before rushing at WildStar and leaping headfirst at him! Sensing the oncoming finisher, WildStar moves to grab Beckett’s legs only to have the rookie lock them around his opponent’s head before swinging back down to the canvas! WildStar’s head is spiked against the canvas courtesy of the Culture Shock! Scrambling, Kyle makes the pin!
1!
2!
3!
Kevin Kim: Your winner by pinfall, ‘Culture Clash,’ KYLE BECKETT!
Del Ramos: Those guys can fukken go.
Artemis Direction: Indeed! And our Australian import continues his undefeated streak!
Hiro Suzuki: It’ll be interesting to see where he goes next. There’s no way management doesn’t see belt potential in him.
Artemis Direction: It would certainly add to the prestige he seems to be seeking for the family name. If he pulls it off, it could be interesting seeing these two go for a rematch with gold on the line.
Hiro Suzuki: Speaking of, our next match will see our very first Emerald City champion crowned!
Artemis shakes her head, scowling.
Artemis Direction: I really don’t know how to feel about this one. On the one hand, Roy really has such a presence about him. And believe me - I greatly appreciate the theatricality. But on the other...I really don’t like this whole contract business he’s talked Davie into.
Del Ramos: Mr. Fancy Pants has definitely shown a streak of cruelty I can sink my teeth into.
Hiro Suzuki: Ooh! I’ve been working on some new plant puns and jokes! They’re gonna knock your stalks off!
Del Ramos: ...Y’know, I bet Valentine knows a fuck ton about poisons.
Kevin Kim: This match is for the first Emerald City championship title, and is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first!
The first low hits of “Shipping Up to Boston” pulse through the Colosseum, with the lights around the Titan-tron pulse green and gold in time with the beat. The screen shows an overhead view of an industrial district, hanging in mid-air for a moment before diving down to the alleys below to show gritty images of hands being taped up, quick footwork of fighters wearing work boots instead of ring boots, and blood spattering against brick walls.
Kevin Kim: From Astoria, Oregon, weighing in at 190 pounds, the Sidewinder, DAVID O’TOOLE!
A lean hooded shadow comes down the ramp, and as he comes into the light David O’Toole pushes back his hood, his expression set and focused. He pauses at the bottom, taking a moment to cast his gaze over the crowd. And as the music moves to the second phrase he nods and raises a fist to knock the air twice in time with the beat, then makes his way up into the ring, where he pulls off his hoodie, tosses it aside, and stands, light on his feet, at the ready.
Kevin Kim: And his opponent, accompanied to the ring by Anastasia Keller; from Cape Elizabeth, Maine, weighing 219 pounds, ROY VALENTINE!
Heavy operatic guitar blares through the stadium. The screen follows a trail of twisting, thorny vines as they wind over a pitch-black floor towards the foot of a marble throne. As the thorns begin to engulf the stone, the camera rises to reveal Roy Valentine lying sideways across his marble seat, legs pitched over its arm. The plants trace a deferential space around Valentine, but utterly consume every inch of bare throne. When the vines finally stop twisting, Valentine snaps his fingers, and the all-encompassing wall of green bursts into bloom, red and gold roses spelling out the name, “ROY VALENTINE”.
Valentine then makes his entrance in the flesh, strutting on stage under a shower of crimson petals. Alongside him stalks his steel wall of an assistant, Anastasia Keller, metal clipboard in hand. Valentine holds a scarlet “Valentine Velvet” rose at his heart, which he tosses into the crowd on his way to the ring, all the while blowing kisses to the adoring--or, perhaps, disgusted--Ascended Army.
Kevin Kim: If Roy Valentine wins this match, David O’Toole must sign the training contract offered to him by the Valentine Estate.
There is no circling patient anticipation this time around—immediately O’Toole moves in and throws a hook across Roy’s jaw, and goes for the shoulders, trying to leverage his height to get his opponent off-balance.
Artemis Direction: Davie’s speed and focus here is admirable!
Del Ramos: If my fukken freedom was on the line, I’d wanna end this quick, too.
Hiro Suzuki: Well you know what they say - the fiercest kind of flower is a dandelion!
Del Ramos: ...Maybe he has an Audrey II to feed you to. I bet he does.
Despite the shot to the face Valentine quickly finds his footing and pulls O’Toole’s arm into a wristlock. O’Toole is unfazed—for a few tense seconds, the duo spin and twirl one another in a vicious waltz as they trade the hold back and forth. Suddenly David finds an opening and knocks Valentine’s arm aside, and in a whirl pivots and flips him in a firm snapmare! Valentine gets no help from inertia to keep the roll going, all his momentum is directed straight down and he hits the mat hard. O’Toole goes for the cover–!
One!
T–!
Valentine kicks out!
Hiro Suzuki: Looks like Valentine wants to make Cact-I + Cact-Me = Cact-Us with O’Toole, and he’s not going to let a few bruises get in the way!
Artemis Direction: Davie’s not letting up!
O’Toole is keen to get Roy into another hold—but Roy rolls just out of his reach, and slides under the bottom rope and out of the ring! His chest heaves with heavy breaths as he turns back to the ring with a victorious smile and a wagging finger… only to meet David diving headlong between the ropes! The two of them go tumbling across the floor!
Del Ramos: HA! TALK SHIT GET HIT! Smarmy fucker deserves it.
Hiro Suzuki: Looks like Roy’s saying, aloe to the floor!
David regains his feet first, and with great and quick determination he scoops Valentine up from behind, tosses him up onto the apron, and in an easy leap hops up himself to drag and throw Valentine back into the ring. Roy finds his feet again in the center, and whips around to find his opponent. The only time O’Toole has relented, even for a moment, and when Valentine turns to spot him, David has a mischievous glint in his eye and a devilish smirk as he shakes his head.
Artemis Direction: Now what does this little imp have in mind?
In a flash O’Toole has crossed the ring—Valentine swipes at him, but the Sidewinder darts aside and catches Roy across the chest with a lariat! They both hit the deck, but David swiftly moves to force Valentine upright and go for a chinlock. But Valentine has his wits about him quick enough that he makes it difficult for David to get a firm hold, flailing and trying to buck him off. David keeps up, but just before he can cinch the hold Valentine gives one more jerk, and he has just enough room to bite O’Toole’s left arm! O’Toole is mostly surprised, almost annoyed, and he thumps the side of Valentine’s head with the heel of his hand. But it’s all the slack Valentine needs—he drives his elbow back into O’Toole’s solar plexus, and while David is stunned he locks the Sidewinder’s right arm into his inner elbow and whips O’Toole over his shoulder! O’Toole lands on the flat of his back!
Hiro Suzuki: Yeesh! That bite was uncalled for!
Del just chuckles, grinning.
Del Ramos: Don’t forget that Roy’s got a lot riding on this, too. In his promo he kept going on and on about creating a legacy. He wants something to live on after him, and it looks like he’s determined to have O’Toole fill the position.
Valentine rises to his feet, dragging a stunned David up by his shirt. He hurls O’Toole into the ropes, and as David rebounds Valentine catches and flips him back to the mat with a hip toss! But before Roy can go for the pin David has rolled backwards and is on his feet, though he’s still crouched and a bit winded. Valentine dives at him, trying to snatch him in any number of pins, but O’Toole squirms out of them so quickly that Godric Smith can’t get in to start a count. Valentine gives David no time or space to retaliate, but it’s clear how comfortable O’Toole is with holding such scrappy defense—and how desperate Valentine is becoming.
Del Ramos: Satan’s halo, is the kid covered in grease or something?
Hiro Suzuki: He’s a slippery elm, isn’t he?
Del Ramos: I’m going to rabbit punch you when you least suspect it.
Finally David has just enough room to shove Valentine away and scramble backwards to fully regain his footing and stand. The two stare daggers at each other from across the ring, then collide together in the middle of the ring and lock up once more.
Artemis Direction: Ohhh I think we’re closing in on the end! Our very first championship awarded at Ascended!
But now Valentine finds leverage, and he forces the both of them to the mat and twists David into a sleeper choke hold before the Sidewinder can retaliate! David fights with all his might to break the hold. He shows no signs of submission; the relentless fervor behind his eyes burns as bright as ever as he reaches for the ropes—and Valentine wrenches him back! Valentine quickly wraps his legs around O’Toole’s stomach in a scissor! O’Toole scrambles for release, but with each passing second he fights with less fervour—yet he refuses to tap. Not until O'Toole's arms hang limp at his sides does Godric signal for the bell!
Kevin Kim: Your winner by submission and first Emerald City Champion, ROY VALENTINE!
Artemis Direction: ...Oh, goodness…
Hiro Suzuki: What all is this going to mean for David O’Toole?
With a cry of surprise and vindication, Valentine shoves O’Toole from his arms and stumbles to his feet. Keller has joined at his side by the time Godric returns holding the title belt. Godric reaches for Valentine’s hand—but Valentine leans over first, tears the belt from his grip, and stalks from the ring with his new accessory shining bright above his head.
There’s a note of apprehension in Artemis’ voice as she speaks.
Artemis Direction: Ascended Army, we have our promotion’s first champion, Roy Valentine.
Del Ramos: Oh, it’s gonna be brutal watching him boss O’Toole around. But not nearly as brutal as our next match.
Del makes a rumbling sound deep in their throat, their smile wide, their eyes bright with a manic glint.
Del Ramos: This is fight is over a year in the making. Neither of them have ever beaten each other. The only time King got a ‘win’ over Quinn was during a triple threat, and he didn’t pin her to win that match. Just when they were starting to get their rivalry off the ground back in Baltimore, they got interrupted by some guy who already had a shot at the title King held, but couldn’t seal the deal. Then they got it started again, but King got tranq’d by Quinn’s girlfriend!
Del growls, fingernails scratching against the tabletop as they curl their hands into fists.
Del Ramos: I fucking swear to God I will personally gut anyone who tries to get in the way of these two finally getting their match.
Kevin Kim: Ascended Army, the following match is for Ascended Wrestling’s Underworld Championship!
The crowd is on its feet, already alternating chants of, ‘LRK! ZEPHYR QUINN! LRK! ZEPHYR QUINN!”
Kevin Kim: Approaching the ring first!
The screens display a flickering, static-struck screen with the crowned rat logo, bone-white over a black and red spattered background as the first riffs of "Hail to the King" begin playing; when the first heavy thrums of rhythm guitar in the music strike, the logo shudders and glitches, electricity running through it from left to right like a broken heartbeat. Below the screens the entrance is flooded with rolling fog cast in blood-red light and white strobe lights that match the beat of the song and of the electric shock waves on the screen.
Kevin Kim: From Portland, Oregon, weighing in at 285lbs, he is the LAB RAT KING!
Where once the Lab Rat King would enter in chains, he now walks freely, his slow and deliberate steps taking him down toward the ring. There's something bestial about the way he moves, like an animated gargoyle; he's accompanied by his wife and valet, Grace King, who seems to keep him from lunging at the jeering crowd with nothing but a hand on his arm and a smirk of her own.
Once he reaches the ropes, Grace cranes up to give him a kiss on the muzzle, and he moves almost animalistically onto the mat, standing up slowly.
Rather suddenly, the Colosseum lights flicker out, dropping the arena into pitch black darkness. Amid the startled gasps and cries from the Ascended Army, a strange sound emerges from somewhere in the ring--it’s a deep thrumming, like air rushing past an open car window.
Del Ramos: The fuck is this? Is this some Doom metal band?
Artemis Direction: I don’t think this was planned…
Hiro Suzuki: ...Wait, this happened before. This sound...during a match between Silvio and King. It made him--
The lights come back on to reveal a new figure standing in the ring. Dressed in a sharp suit with a rose-shaped lapel pin, he wears a featureless white mask, concealing his face from the broadcasting cameras and clutching what looks like a recording device or radio in ons hand. Perhaps more shocking than the sudden appearance is the fact that he has his foot planted on the Lab Rat King’s chest, the mutant monster subdued completely by the noise.
Del Ramos: OH MOTHER FUCKER! THAT’S IT! WHERE’S MY GUTTIN’ KNIFE?!
Several other figures dressed in black swarm into the ring, also wearing masks; they create a barrier between the ring and the security team. The figure in the ring jabs a finger at Kevin Kim, gesturing for the mic. Intimidated and unsure, the announcer hands over the microphone at arm’s length. When the stranger lifts it up to speak, his voice is affected by a modulator that adds a distorted crackle, rendering it difficult to identify.
??: I told you I’d come to collect, didn’t I, big guy? What, did you think you could run forever?
At ringside, Grace King rolls over the apron and to her feet, attempting to rush the stranger. She’s stopped by two of the people in black, who hold her by the arms as she fights to reach her husband, swearing up a storm that would make a sailor blush.
??: I figured you would do that. At-tut-tut. Naughty children. And don’t expect security to come rushing in, either--I made sure they’re busy. Elsewhere.
Below him, Kane King struggles to stay awake under the assault of the thrumming sound; his head rolls to the side, his feral eyes unfocused. He tries to claw at the leg of the man half-standing on him, but he can barely lift his arm. He snarls something inaudible, heels sliding and pushing at the canvas. Whatever that noise is, it’s doing something to his nervous system.
Hiro Suzuki: What is he doing?!
Artemis Direction: Someone--! Oh, dear… I don’t know that anyone can get to the ring right now through these ruffians!
Lab Rat King: R… Rrr… RrrrrrRRROSE….!!
Rose: Aww, you do remember me! Do you remember that you’re my fucking property, also, you overgrown rat? My faaaavourite little guinea pig. How long did you think you could broadcast yourself on national television before I found you, huh? You could’ve laid low in a ditch somewhere, played dead like a possum. But no--you’re ambitious. You gotta chase that gold! And that’s why you got caught, big guy--rat can’t resist the cheese.
He shoots a glance toward the ringside table, where the Underworld Title Belt rests, obsidian inlays glimmering like oil under the warm arena lights.
Rose: So you’re gonna kiss this audacious, tacky shithole goodbye, and come with me.
Rose looks at Grace King, who looks like she’s ready to tear his throat out with her teeth.
Rose: You’re gonna stay out of it, sweetheart. I know about your little bundle of joy--and if you come looking for my Lab Rat again, I’ll make sure little Luna’s disappearance goes into the local news as a tragic tale of parental negligence. Capiche?
Grace King pulls against the pair of hands holding her, and her scream of rage doesn’t need a microphone to be heard.
Grace King: YOU’RE NOT TOUCHING MY FAMILY EVER AGAIN, YOU GREASY ASSHOLE!!
Beneath Rose, the Lab Rat King bucks suddenly in a burst of protective rage, surprising him. He nearly drops the sound device, growling angrily. King aims a sharp and desperate elbow jab at the masked assailant’s knee, bringing him halfway down, but Rose retaliates by shoving the sound device directly against his ear, causing the muzzled mutant to buckle back down to the mat.
Rose: Bad, bad dog!
Rose holds him there, on one knee, the device pressed to King’s temple.
Rose: Ok--my guys are gonna come over here and give you a nice little sleepy-time shot--a little bit stronger than what I gave little Miss Silva last time to put you down.
He looks behind him, up at the arena ramp, where Zephyr Quinn stands blocked off by masked intruders--too many to push through--and gives her a salute, and somehow she can feel him smirking. She bares her teeth, fists shaking with the desire to rip him apart.
Artemis Direction: Oh, my God they can’t just do this!
Del Ramos: Yeah, don’t worry, Artemis, I still got some gas left in the tank.
With that, Del Ramos, retired hardcore wrestler, begins rolling up their sleeves.
Del Ramos: They try and take King, I’m throwing hands.
Rose: Then we’re gonna carry you out of here and head back to the Lab--where you belong, big guy--so we can figure out what kind of chemical cocktail we put into you is keeping you alive this long. Your contributions to the scientific community will be… deeply appreciated. By someone, I’m sure. You’re just a letter to me, Patient Z. So if you don’t mind--
--and Rose is interrupted, rather loudly, by the distorted opening vocals of Lonely Island’s, "I'm So Humble."
The music fades to the background as the arena big screen glows to life, showing one Marcus Afsah, president and CEO, sitting at his desk. In front of him he has a bottle of cognac on the go next to a crystal glass, and a laptop where he’s watching the show’s live feed. He leans forward toward the camera, moving the gold-rimmed aviators up in his hairline down over his eyes.
Marcus Afsah: Did you call my operation ‘tacky’? Rude.
The Ascended Army jeers. Rose keeps his hand planted firmly against King’s temple with the device underneath it, but he’s twisted around to watch the screen, startled.
Marcus Afsah: Listen, Rosy Cheeks, or whatever your name is. You seem to be under some kinda misguided impression that the man you’re pinning to the canvas right now with your dumb wizard magic noise machine belongs to you. That’s, uhh. Well it’s factually inaccurate. See, Kane King signed a contract when he started here.
He lifts said contract from the desk in front of him, showing the signature.
Marcus Afsah: Now I don’t demand exclusivity from my gladiators--I’m not stupid, I know how the world works now. I’m not a creatively bankrupt old man clinging to decades-old expectations, unlike some promoters in this millennium. But you can’t produce any paperwork proving that King is under your employ, can you? Nah. You wouldn’t wanna leave a paper trail.
Rose stammers, then starts to get angry.
Rose: I don’t care--
Marcus Afsah: Shh, daddy’s talking. Jodie, the portfolio, if you don’t mind.
Jodie Ngyuen enters the frame, expression passive as she deposits a thick portfolio in front of Marcus on his desk. He gives it a pat.
Marcus Afsah: What’s in here again, Jodie?
Jodie Nyguen: Every piece of information we’ve gathered, regarding the operations of the man currently holding one of our roster members hostage in the arena, sir. Names, addresses, phone records, emails, photos, connections to multiple missing persons across the contingent United States, and a few from South America.
Marcus Afsah: Oh yeah. That’s right. Geez, I’m so goddamn busy kicking back in my ‘audacious’ accommodations that the details slip my mind sometimes. I guess we’ve been tracking all of this down since we signed King in the event that a contingency plan came into play.
Rose has gone stock still in the arena. He slowly lowers the microphone in his hand.
Marcus looks back into the camera, taking a sip from the glass of cognac to wet his lips before carrying on.
Marcus Afsah: So here’s the real deal, ‘kiddo’. I’m an investor. I built my fortune on savvy acquisitions, betting on the right horses or whatever. It’s what I do. So don’t think for a goddamn second I wouldn’t go through the steps necessary to protect my assets. That big fella you’re holding down right now? He’s my investment. If you threaten my investments… I’ll happily dig up all the dirt I need to bury you.
The Ascended Army is cheering now, hurling insults and taunts at the invaders in the ring. Rose looks as though he has no idea what to do, but releasing the monster beneath him is out of the question, if he doesn’t want to get snapped in half.
Marcus Afsah: The deal is, you call off your cronies giving my security team trouble… and they escort you and your masked buddies out. You leave empty-handed, and this--
--he pats the portfolio with a hand heavy with gold rings--
Marcus Afsah: --never makes it into the hands of the authorities. You don’t come looking for the Lab Rat again and it stays that way. Cool?
Shaking, Rose puts the mic down--with no other choice, he pulls a radio from his pocket, hissing orders into it. A keen lip reader could make out the words ‘pull out’ and ‘we’re compromised’. He checks his watch, then looks back up at the screen, seething.
Rose: … Yeah. ‘Cool’.
Artemis Direction: Well! Leave it to Marcus to think of all the angles!
Minutes later, Ascended Securirty floods into the arena; they quickly gather the intruders, and one of the guards confiscates the sound device in Rose’s hand. As they’re escorted out to a chorus of cheers and jeers, the Lab Rat King comes to in the ring, sitting up. Grace King throws her arms around him, and the Army erupts in cheers as he wraps his heavy arms around her comparatively tiny frame.
Del Ramos: Yeah, yeah, it’s all very touching but WHERE THE FUCK IS MY FEAST OF RAW MEAT AND BLOOD?!
Climbing to his feet, King slowly releases Grace, dipping forward to allow her to place a kiss on the black leather of his muzzle--then, as she slides out of the ring, he turns his eyes toward Zephyr Quinn on the ramp.
Lab Rat King: I CAN’T WAIT ANY LONGER TO TASTE YOUR BONES, HUNTRESS--LET’S SING TOGETHER! NOW NOW NOW NOW!!
Zephyr Quinn grins wildly--and without wasting a breath, sprints down the ramp to meet her monstrous counterpart.
The two collide at the bottom of the ramp as the Ascended Army cheer their support.
The rhythmic chanting leads way to the two gladiators trading blows up the ramp! Neither gives an inch as they reach the top, LRK taking quick advantage and dodges a blow from Zephyr! Using her own momentum against her, LRK pushes her head first and hard into the lightboard on the side of the entrance!
Artemis Direction: My my my! I don’t think those two care a fig about using the ring!
Del Ramos: They’re going to demolish this place and I am here for it!
Zephyr recovers quickly and with a howl of rage charges at LRK! Zephyr drives them both off the ramp and through tables set up below, reminiscent of their first meeting. LRK is the first to get up, followed quickly by Zephyr. She lunges at him, but doesn’t pay attention to the piece of wood in his hand! With a swing, he manages to stab Zephyr in the shoulder! She doesn’t seem to mind as she spears him!
The crowd erupts in chants of, ‘HO-LY SHIT! HO-LY SHIT!’
Hiro Suzuki: They’re not holding anything back right out the gate!
Del Ramos: You kidding me? These two have been battle horny for this fight for what - more than a year now?
Artemis Direction: Absolutely, hunty! These two marvelous monsters… well, no matter how this match ends, I doubt this will be the last we see of them in a fight!
Zephyr rolls to her feet, wincing as she pulls the spike out of her skin and tosses it to the side. She snarls as she meets LRK’s glare. The two collide once again, trading shots as the chaos moves to the nearby concrete stairs! Zephyr gets a running start before charging at The Lab Rat King. Ready for the attack, LRK lifts his opponent up and drops her on the railing with a modified gut buster!
A collective cry of sympathetic pain goes up from the audience, the camera catching a few people looking utterly aghast.
Hiro Suzuki: Oh, my God! Is she still moving?!
The crowd erupts as Zephyr gets to her feet holding her midsection. Seeing this, Kane quickly goes on the attack, chasing Zephyr up the stairs while trading blows. The two make it up to the next landing and jockey for position. With another running start, Zephyr charges at Kane, only to get lifted up and dropped on the hard concrete with a brutal spinebuster!
Artemis Direction: He’s just so tremendously strong!
Del is laughing maniacally.
Del Ramos: FUCKING YES! AHAHAHA! FUCK EVERY MATCH THAT ISN’T THIS ONE!
LRK looks to stomp on Zephyr but she quickly rolls out of the way and to her knees. Zephyr charges at King who is once again ready, flipping Zephyr into the air with a back body drop! Zephyr is ready this time though and catches herself on the railing above with Kane right below her. Without a second thought, Zephyr hops up onto the railing and springs backward with a moonsault!
Del Ramos: Look at Zephyr’s fukken versatility! This bitch is vicious on the land, in the sea, and in the air!
Artemis Direction: Our Amazonian Queen never disappoints, does she?
Kane catches her but soaks up the momentum, propelling him backwards and having him perched precariously at the top of the stairs! Zephyr charges once again and the two topple down the stairs! King’s head bangs against one of the railings, sending a hollow thud throughout the arena! Zephyr is the first to her feet, breathing deeply and holding her ribs still. Down, but not out, LRK rolls to his feet almost a second later, his growls indicating that this is far from over.
Hiro cringes.
Hiro Suzuki: Yeesh! We’re barely into this fight and I’m wondering if either of these two will live to see the light of another day!
Artemis Direction: They’ve both shown remarkable resiliency in the past. They each seem to crave the challenge and the violence that goes with it!
Del Ramos: When it’s in your blood - really a part of your identity - you can’t get away from it.
The two charge each other again, this time LRK getting a slight advantage, which he uses to lift Zephyr up and grabbing her feet while she’s in the air, throws her right into a table leaning up against a nearby wall! Splinters fly everywhere as Zephyr crashes through the wood and steel but amazingly gets right to her feet again. Instead of charging at Kane, this time she runs away from him, climbing a nearby girder to the maintenance platform high above! Not one to shy away from a challenge, LRK easily manages to do the same.
Artemis Direction: Oh dear! Do you think that’s going to hold them!?
Del Ramos: THIS IS WHY I LOVE THESE TWO FUCKERS! THEY DON’T GIVE A SHIT! THEY JUST WANNA WRECK SHOP!
Hiro Suzuki: Hey, what do you call a custodian that works at a dispensary?
Artemis Direction: I don’t know, dear heart, what do you call them?
Hiro Suzuki: High maintenance!
Zephyr quickly grabs the closest thing to her that wasn’t nailed down, a spotlight, and smashes it over LRK’s head as soon as he gets to the top, he loses his balance and threatens to fall, but Zephyr isn’t done and quickly grabs a nearby extension cord, wrapping it around the neck of her opponent and tying it in place. Zephyr grabs the other hand and with a shrug, jumps off the platform!
Hiro cries out, Artemis lets out something between a scream and a gasp, hand going to her mouth, and Del just gapes in disbelieving awe and joy.
As she falls, she kicks at LRK, forcing him to lose his balance and swing through the air by his neck still tied with the cord, creating a pendulum effect! Zephyr pulls herself closer to Kane and yells at him.
Zephyr Quinn: Pass out King! Declare me your ‘queen’ and pass out! Think about that precious family of yours as I reign supreme!
The mention of his family seems to give King life as his eyes snap open and he growls, headbutting Zephyr, stunning her! Using the cord he pulls himself up to the platform and pulls Zephyr up with him!
Lab Rat King: YOU!!! WILL!!! KNEEL!!!
Chants of, ‘HO-LY SHIT! HO-LY SHIT!’ echo through the arena.
Del Ramos: HOW THE FUCK COULD THIS GET ANY BETTER?!
Zephyr dodges an attack from King and rolls to her feet and charges her adversary! LRK is ready this time though and lifts her in the air, dropping her off the platform with an Empty, Hollow, Thud! Zephyr falls through the air as King follows her, the two landing hard on the platform below, creating a crater in the process!
Hiro Suzuki: Are either of our fighters still alive?!
The dust clears and when it does the ref slides in to make the count…
ONE!
TWO!
THREE!
The crowd cheers but are unsure who covered who, only for their questions are answered as LRK howls in triumph!
Kevin Kim: The winner of this match--AND FIRST Underworld Champion--The Lab Rat King!!
Jill Kincaid offers the monster his belt, somewhat cautiously. He takes it with surprising respect, raising it over his head as the Ascended Army goes wild!
Slinging his trophy up against his massive shoulder, he grabs the mic out of Kevin Kim’s hand, scaring the shit out of him, and lifts it to his muzzled face for the first time.
Lab Rat King: Let this stand as a WARNING to you, courrrrrageous contenders--no matter HOW LONG you chase me, no matter HOW HARD YOU WANT IT--YOU WILL KNEEL BEFORE THE KING!! THIS RAT WILL NEVER AGAIN BE CAGED--BUT I DARRRRRE YOU TO TRY!
He then shoves the mic into Kevin Kim’s chest hard enough to nearly knock him over, looks back once at his fallen rival, then is on his way to the uproar of the coliseum crowd.
Del is elated, howling right along with LRK.
Del Ramos: There had better be a fucking re-match! I wanna see these two make a mangled masterpiece out in the fucking street! Or better yet - why not an Underworld defense in the Underground?
Artemis Direction: Our next match… Oh, darlings, it’s all a little too tragic for me.
Hiro Suzuki: Is there going to be any salvaging of this friendship after all’s said and done?
Del Ramos: I’d say that’s Hawke’s decision. Win or lose, he’s the one who got hurt. We’re going to find out if the outcome of this fight makes him a bitter fuck or makes him more apt to forgive our corvid cryptid for what he failed to do.
Artemis lets out an exasperated huff.
Artemis Direction: How can you say that? Silvio had no idea of what was going on! If the blame belongs anywhere, it’s squarely on the shoulders of Mara Lang! She’s the one who kidnapped him and conducted experiments on him!
Hiro Suzuki: Ones that have left him able to control when and if he feels pain. That’s a pretty big disadvantage for Silvio.
Del Ramos: We saw submission moves don’t work on this guy. Leon’s only options are going to be pinfall or just fucking knocking him out. And both of those things are still going to be hard to do considering Hawke’s resiliency.
Kevin Kim: Ascended Army, this is your main event of the evening to crown the first Ascended Wrestling World Champion!
The crowd is absolutely electric, amped up from everything that came before and looking for one last ride before they go.
Kevin Kim: Introducing first!
The lights in the Colosseum go out, the big screen displaying a black and white image of a Ouija board lit by candles and surrounded by scattered tarot cards and raw crystals. A planchette's point moves of its own volition across the name, ‘Silvio Leon’ written in the classic Ouija font as the opening solo of ‘Superstition,’ by Kyle Primus goes careening around the arena. The entrance is bathed in blacklight, a figure moving through it to stand at the top of the ramp, lifting their hands in front of their face to create the shape of a planchette.
Kevin Kim: Now entering the ring from Seattle, Washington, weighing in at 195 pounds, he is your 'Mystifying Oracle,' SILVIO LEON!
At the top of the ramp, Silvio throws down his hands, a pair of white pyros going off on either side of him as the house lights come back up. Making his way to the ring, he interacts heavily with the fans, giving them high fives, fist bumps, and taking selfies as he progresses. He does an acrobatic little flip over the top rope before landing on the canvas, but his jocular attitude fades as he turns to face the ramp, expression conflicted. Closing his eyes, he takes a deep breath, becoming still. Opening his eyes again, his face is calm, posture relaxed but ready. The coolness just serves to bring out the fiery intensity of his gaze; his expression a study of stark juxtapositions.
Kevin Kim: And his opponent!
The lights go out as the eerie opening chords of, ‘The Experiment,’ seep into the Colosseum like poison. On the big screen we see anatomical figures, flayed nerves, and a figure in silhouette walking across a bed of coals. As he comes closer, the figure on the screen resolves into a smirking Insensate. Where Mara would typically accompany The Insensate to the ring, Sebastian Hawke, walking out of the tunnel, stands alone. Flickering black lights illuminate a venomously colored purple mist that crawls out like a living thing from the entrance, wreathing around Hawke in a noxious, miasmic aura.
Kevin Kim: Hailing from Las Vegas, Nevada, he is The Insensate, SEBASTIAN HAWKE!
Sebastian’s gaze doesn’t leave Silvio, and while his loping walk has the sort of easy confidence of a wolf who knows it has nothing in the forest to fear, his eyes are no less alight than the Oracle’s. His desire for retribution is palpable, crackling electric through every movement. He is a walking bomb waiting to go off in the ring. And when he climbs in, as relaxed and ready as his opponent, he licks his lips with a lazy smirk, cracking his knuckles and rolling his shoulders.
Del Ramos: Ohhh… I might have spoken too soon. This? This is gonna get fukken mean.
For a long moment, the pair simply stare at each other, standing about a foot apart in the ring. Leon extends a hand to Seb who, surprisingly, takes it.
Del Ramos: Oh, c’mon, don’t tell me Hawke’s--
And promptly wrenches Silvio’s fingers backward, causing Leon to cry out and take a knee!
Del Ramos: HA! Going for the moneymaker. Literally!
Hiro Suzuki: Doesn’t Silvio do tattoo work?
Artemis looks concerned.
Artemis Direction: He’s an artist and going after his hands feels… especially cruel!
Seb grins as he watches Silvio crumple, promptly bringing his knee up into Leon’s face! The Oracle reels back managing to work his fingers free from Hawke’s grip! He moves with the momentum, somersaulting backward and rising to his feet again, shaking his hand out with a grimace. Hawke doesn’t let up for a moment, hitting Silvio’s already compromised arm with a roundhouse kick!
Hiro Suzuki: The Insensate just working that arm over!
Del Ramos: It’s a smart way to work. Take your opponent apart one limb at a time. Leon has a lot of high-impact moves that’ll be a lot more dangerous to pull off if they hurt him more than they hurt Hawke.
Silvio staggers back into the ropes! Sebastian doesn’t let up, grabbing that arm he’s been punishing and uses it as a fulcrum to whip his opponent into the ropes!
Hiro Suzuki: You know, I’ve got this new theory about inertia. Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem to be gaining momentum!
As the Oracle returns, he seems to have found his wits and hits Hawke with a Kitchen Sink!
Artemis Direction: That’s it, darling!
Del Ramos: Let’s see if Leon’s finally realizing this ain’t gonna go down any way but bloody.
Hawke hits the mat and, realizing he can’t let up for a moment, Leon immediately hops up onto the second rope, executing a springboard moonsault on his opponent! He goes for the pin, Godric Smith sliding in for the count!
1!
Kick out from Hawke!
As Sebastian rises, he grins at Silvio, seeming completely unfazed by the impact. The Oracle looks on, his expression that of someone who has just had a terrible epiphany; a nightmare reality he can’t do a damn thing about. His mouth hardens into a line and, eyes determined, he climbs to his feet again, grabbing Sebastian and dragging him upright. Before he can make another move, though, Hawke grabs hold of his arm, that arm that he’s been focusing on since the beginning, and wrenches it behind Leon’s back in a vicious hammerlock!
Del laughs sadistically, slamming a hand against the desktop.
Del Ramos: Leon can’t give this fucker an inch! If he doesn’t up the intensity, he’s not gonna win this thing.
Silvio lets out a sharp cry, grimacing as he tries to work his way free, but that pain is working against him. Seb leans in closer, grinning cruelly as he whispers something into Silvio’s ear.
You made me this.
Leon’s expression shifts, knees trembling a bit as Sebastian continues to wrench that arm, smirking triumphantly.
??: HEY! SEB!
Surprised, Hawke looks up, locking eyes with a young man standing against the guard rail of the front row, blazing green eyes lined with gold, chewing a piece of gum.
Hiro Suzuki: ...Is that?
Artemis Direction: Well, look at that! Silvio's dear little rock star sweetheart, Axton Gunn!
Hiro Suzuki: Weren't Gunn and Hawke in a stable together?
Artemis Direction: They were indeed back in Baltimore.
Axton Gunn promptly flips Hawke the bird, chewing his gum almost angrily.
Axton Gunn: Answer your texts, douchebag! Also get your shit together, holy fuck!
Sebastian looks furious, actually loosening his grip on Silvio and starting to scream at Gunn. Not wasting a chance to turn things around, Leon breaks free and nails Hawke’s back with a spinning heel kick that sends the Insensate slamming into the top rope in front of him. Seemingly wanting to take it easy on his arm, he goes for a super kick, only for Hawke to seize his leg, arrogance replaced by anger, as he hurls him to the canvas with a dragon screw!
Hiro Suzuki: He just… doesn’t feel it…
Del Ramos: Hawke’s got everything going for him for this fight. He’s had it rough in life, and it’s made him more resourceful, and without worrying about sensation, he’s going to be quicker to recover and react. And he’s in Leon’s head.
Hawke goes for the pin!
1!
2!
No!
Sebastian gets to his feet, looking down at Leon, an expression of disgust on his face. He starts hauling him upright only for the Oracle to hit him rapid fire with a series of elbow strikes! Hawke staggers backward into the nearest turnbuckle - just because he can’t feel pain doesn’t mean he can’t be moved. Leon’s teeth gritted, he mounts the second rope and starts laying into Hawke! Whatever else may have transpired, there’s just no other way to win this match. He knows what it is to be ruthless. He just never expected he’d have to demonstrate it to a friend. Dragging a struggling Insensate away from the turnbuckle, arm locked around his neck, Silvio uses the ropes to float over, bringing Hawke down hard with a tornado DDT!
Hiro Suzuki: Starry Wisdom!
Both fighters climb to their feet at the same time, though Silvio is cringing as he clutches the arm that’s been worked over. Falling in toward each other. They lock up, trading holds, struggling for an advantage. That wounded arm gives Sebastian the edge, positioning the Oracle close enough to nail him with a headbutt, sending him staggering, then locks him up for an inverted DDT of his own! Slammed onto the canvas and left writhing in the center of the ring, Leon is helpless as Sebastian mounts the nearest turnbuckle and comes down with a Coup de Grâce!
Del Ramos: Pinpoint from Hawke! Oh, this has gotta be it.
He goes for the pin!
1!
2!
Silvio manages to kick out just as Godric’s hand is about to hit the mat a third time!
Enraged, the Insensate yanks Silvio upright and slaps him hard across one cheek, his head snapping to one side. Grabbing him by the hair and yanking him forward, he presses his forehead to Leon’s, seething, and screams into his face.
Sebastian Hawke: GIVE UP!
Dazed, still leaning against Seb seemingly for support as much as intimidation, he shakes his head slowly.
Silvio Leon: Not leaving...without you...
Hawke’s lip curls in disgust. Rolling his eyes, he drags the Oracle upright, but as he does, Silvio jerks backward out of his grip, catching hold of his arm. He spins Seb like a dancer in a ripcord knee strike that connects with his head! Gritting his teeth, he doesn’t let go, instead connecting with yet another strike, before grabbing the back of Sebastian’s head and driving him into the mat with a one-handed bulldog!
The crowd is on its feet, the growing roar something you can feel in your bones.
Silvio, breath ragged, slick with sweat, spares one last look at Sebastian’s prone body before turning and pointing at the nearest top turnbuckle.
Moving quickly, not wanting to give the Insensate time to recover, he mounts the top turnbuckle, steadies himself, and launches into the air, spinning and twisting like a dervish before hitting Sebastian Hawke with every ounce of that chaotic velocity!
Del Ramos: COLOR OUT OF SPACE!
Not wasting a second, Silvio goes for the pin!
1!
2!
3!
Kevin Kim: Your winner and FIRST ASCENDED WRESTLING WORLD CHAMPION, THE ORACLE, SILVIO LEON!
Still laid out on the canvas, gasping for air, aching from every angle, Silvio just stares at the ceiling as the crowd comes unglued!
Rising with difficulty, Hawke spares one disgusted look at Silvio before rolling out of the ring and walking dejectedly up the ramp.
Godric Smith comes to the Oracle’s side, checking on him and helping him to get up. Wobbling from the effort just to stand for a moment, he seems to find one last well of strength still left over as the referee hands him the title belt. Swallowing hard, closing his eyes for a second, he takes the belt, opens his eyes to gaze down upon it, then straightens and lifts it above his head to the adulation of all in attendance.
Artemis Direction: And there you have it, Ascended Army! Our first Pay-Per-View in the bag and our first set of champions crowned!
Del Ramos: Fucking delicious. I haven’t seen that kind of brutality in ages. And it’s only gonna get bloodier as time goes on!
Hiro Suzuki: Speaking of, I studied hard for my recent blood test! I got an A+!
Del Ramos: Yeah? Hey c’mere and lemme see.
Artemis Direction: Goodnight, everyone!
Credits
Sherah Prince vs. Brick Hardcheese - Kyle Beckett
Chiba Suzumiya vs. Hot Dropkick - Kyle Beckett
Amelia pre-match promo - Amelia ‘Wildheart’ Winston
Amelia ‘Wildheart’ Winston vs. Frater Perdurabo - Amelia ‘Wildheart’ Winston
Roy Valentine vs. David O’Toole - Roy Valentine and David O’Toole
Rose segment - LRK
Zephyr Quinn vs. LRK - Zephyr Quinn
Everything else - Ampersand
A special thank you to my match and segment writers as well as my judges for matches I was unable to judge due to participation or possible lack of impartiality. Hope you enjoyed, all!
Here we are!
As Freddie Mercury’s vocals ring out across the Colosseum, a fan of multi-colored lasers ignite along the entrance ramp, their gritty intensity soon joined by gold pyros bursting at the top of the stage! Across the Big Screen, we see profiles of each member of the roster flash by in rapid succession!
Born to be kings!
We see Sherah and Adam Prince standing side by side with Bo Fletcher on the observation deck of the Space Needle, caught in the neon glow of the city at night. They gaze out with eager expressions across the city center; the MoPop, the Science Center, and Climate Pledge Arena spreading out around them. We flash to the International District, Chiba Suzumiya framed by the intricate lattice metal work dragon outside of the Uwajimaya, her mask glinting in the glow of the city night. Mara Lang stands in her office, bathed in the fluorescent luminescence of the overhead lights, before an anatomical chart of a neuron, skimming the tip of one finger up along the axon, nucleus, and dendrite.
We're the princes of the universe
Here we belong, fighting to survive
In a world with the darkest powers
The lines of the dendrites darken and extend, becoming roots running through a basement; or a pit. Gnarled fingers close around equally gnarled roots, yanking them free in a shower of soil and stone. As the camera pulls out, we see the back of Bill Woods, eerily still for a moment before turning his head, one eye gleaming with sinister intent from behind his mask. Following the roots once again, we’re taken upward to the surface where Frater Perdurabo stands shrouded in dark pines and moonlight like a fairytale monster lurking in the forest. We’re then with Amelia ‘Wildheart’ Winston being interviewed by Dave. Her eyes are bright, expression growing intense as she speaks; her focus and intent are singular and sharp. She is a woman on a mission.
And here we are, we're the princes of the universe
Here we belong, fighting for survival
We've come to be the rulers of you all
We find ourselves in the stands of the Colosseum with WildStar. He adjusts his grip on his bag of gear as he surveys the ring and rigging being set up. One last ride. One last time to set things right. In the ring, running the ropes, is a young man whose own ride is just beginning. Kyle Beckett has everything to prove and the momentum to do it. He won’t lose it here. His footsteps echo louder across the canvas, taking on a different quality, and we’re taken to Davie O’Toole free running down the metallic slope of the ‘Black Lightning’ public art installation in the shadow of the Space Needle. It isn’t just a possible mark in the ‘L’ column he has to worry about. He may very well have put his freedom on the line. It’s a question of whether or not he can beat the man that now fills the screen. Roy Valentine paces down hallways of an ostentatious dwelling, peering with a smug expression into empty rooms and facilities that seem as though they are waiting for their occupant to arrive.
I am immortal, I have inside me blood of kings
I have no rival, no man can be my equal
Take me to the future of you all
Standing in the shallows of Lake Washington just off Matthews Beach, Zephyr Quinn is bathed in starlight; the choppy water reflecting a moonlit shine that makes her look like she was wrought in silver. A lunatic angel. But the night holds dark as well as light, and we see it in the Lab Rat King as he skulks along the statue of the Troll under the Fremont Bridge. The glint in his eye isn’t the same anymore; it lacks the wild, leaping bonfire madness it once held. Instead, its gleam is hot, focused, and bright as an ember. Not that fire holds much power over Sebastian Hawke any longer, which he’s more than happy to demonstrate. LRK’s amber eye melts into the flame of a silver, flip-top lighter, the Insensate running his fingertips through it before setting a photo of Silvio Leon alight. He smirks, crumpling the smoldering image into his fist. As the bits of the photo crumble away, they become flecks of light that scatter across Silvio Leon’s face. He’s standing in gorilla position, just behind the entrance at the top of the ramp, gazing out at the crowd assembled in the Colosseum. He breathes deep, in and out, before glancing up and looking at the viewer. At first he blinks, surprised, then grins, giving the viewer a nod, the tiniest pause in the music so his voice can be heard as he says: “You ready?” Light swallows up his silhouette as the music kicks back in.
Born to be kings, princes of the universe
Fighting and free
Got your world in my hand
I'm here for your love and I'll make my stand
We were born to be princes of the universe!
Pyros are firing and the crowd is positively roaring as the Colosseum comes back into focus. A few posters catch the eye as the view soars over the crowd.
I <3 WILDHEART
SHE’S A KILLER QUINN!
BY THE POWER OF GREYSKULL!
HAWKE FOR CHAMP!
Artemis Direction, Del Ramos, and Hiro Suzuki are seated at the commentary table. Artemis looks flawless in an elaborate rose-gold wig studded with stars, a glimmering gold dress hugging her curves, Hiro has cleaned up surprisingly well in a slate grey suit and navy tie, and even Del has put on a nice-looking long-sleeved black graphic tee with a complex heavy metal logo design emblazoned across it, accented with silver studs.
Artemis Direction: Welcome, Ascended Army, to Ascension! Ascended Wrestling’s first Pay-Per-View event! We have quite a show for you this evening!
Del grins.
Del Ramos: Do we ever. Gonna be the first time we award gold here, too.
Hiro Suzuki: And some exciting new talents are making their debut! Kicking things off on our first PPV match is Sherah Prince vs. Brick Hardcheese!
Artemis Direction: Mr. Prince is certainly quite the specimen, isn’t he? We work in an industry of exceptional bodies, and even among those, he is something truly unique!
Hiro Suzuki: Hey, did you hear about Dr. Frankenstein entering into a bodybuilding competition?
Del Ramos: If there was any justice in this world, when you give us the punchline to this ‘joke,’ a swarm of centipedes would escape your stupid fucking mouth instead.
Hiro Suzuki: Turns out he seriously misunderstood the objective!
Del Ramos: I swear one day I will see you eaten alive by insects from the inside out. Anyway, that Sherah guy’s fine, but he seems like one of those gentle giant types. Now the match after him? That has some promise for a little viciousness!
Artemis Direction: Chiba Suzumiya! What a little spitfire she is! Can’t wait to see her in action.
Hiro winces a little.
Hiro Suzuki: The next two fights...I’m not really sure I’m ready to see.
Del Ramos: You kidding? This whole show is a goddamn gift to an’ old blood letter like me. Not only do we have our first Underworld Championship match, but we get to see some monsters tearing it up! First we have Lang and The Pit. They’re both in it for the pain and I can’t wait to see what happens there.
Artemis Direction: The next fight...goodness gracious it’s quite the David and Goliath tale!
Del Ramos: I can’t wait to see more Frater in action. The way he came in with that fukken slasher movie monster energy was perfect.
Hiro Suzuki: Maybe, but I don’t think Amelia is going to be easily frightened or intimidated. She came out swinging in her debut and has made no bones about what her ambitions are.
Artemis Direction: And then we have a literal battle of the ages. Rookie upstart versus wily veteran! And Kyle has been so far undefeated here at Ascended.
Del Ramos: Guess we’re gonna see if the kid can keep his streak running.
Hiro Suzuki: The next fight is going to be our first title awarded to an Ascended Gladiator.
Artemis Direction: The Emerald City Championship! Roy Valentine and David O’Toole are getting their rematch from Collision #3 when they fought each other to a draw!
Del Ramos: Both of them have shown the Ascended Army they can throw down when necessary, putting on some brutal matches in the past few weeks.
Hiro Suzuki: But there’s another wrinkle in that match - something else on the line. Valentine was offering O’Toole a contract of some kind, and from the sounds of it, it’s a bad deal. O’Toole had really better hope he pulls a win out of this one, or he might end up as nothing more than Valentine’s indentured servant.
Del Ramos: Then we have the meal I been lookin’ forward to all year. Quinn vs. King.
Their eyes are bright, their smile broad.
Del Ramos: I can’t think of a single thing I want more in this world than seeing those two going at it!
Artemis Direction: And it’s an Underworld rules match, which means no disqualifications. Weaponry can be used, falls count anywhere, the sky’s the limit. And we know how violent both Ms. Quinn and Mr. Rat can be individually, darlings. Putting them together? Why, the city might not survive!
Hiro Suzuki: Well they better leave something for our main event match to fight on. We’re about to see the culmination of a bitter fight between Silvio Leon and Sebastian Hawke.
Artemis Direction: Oh, my poor child. He had no idea…
Del Ramos: Seems like Hawke doesn’t give a shit. He was abducted by Lang and… had Satan only knows what done to him.
Hiro Suzuki: Whatever it was made him able to control when he feels pain.
Artemis Direction: Evidently it was a traumatizing experience and Sebastian places the blame squarely on Silvio’s shoulders for not being there to save him from it.
Del Ramos: What good is a hero if he can’t even save his closest friends?
Artemis Direction: How can you fix something if you don’t know it’s broken?
Hiro holds up his hands.
Hiro Suzuki: Whatever the outcome is, one man will walk away from that ring as the first Ascended Wrestling World Champion.
Artemis Direction: Everything is on the line this show. Our victors and vanquished are going to determine the direction of this company.
Del Ramos: Don’t forget - we still need contenders for the tag belts.
Hiro Suzuki: Yeah! I wonder who’s going to pioneer our tag division? We just signed on a new Gladiator, Eleni Tolis, who will be competing in our next edition of Collision!
Artemis Direction: I’m positively atwitter with anticipation, dear heart!
Back in the ring, Kevin Kim, looking dapper in a tux, has the mic.
Kevin Kim: Ascended Army, welcome to your first ever Ascended Wrestling Pay-Per-View - Ascension!
The Ascended Army roars in response, the sound feeling not so much that it’s coming from the people as it is the building’s own voice speaking.
Kevin Kim: This evening the first ever Ascended championships will be awarded! You will have your inaugural Ascended Emerald City, Underworld, and World Champions!
Cheers rise from the crowd, posters catching the eye of the viewer.
ROSES ARE A GIRL’S BEST FRIEND
LEON DID NOTHING WRONG
WILDSTAR’S STILL GOT IT
RAGGING ON GRUNGE = FIGHTING WORDS, A.D.
Kevin Kim: And now fighting in your first ever Ascended Wrestling Pay-Per-View, we have now coming to the ring!
"Warriors" by Aaliyah Rose begins to play over the PA system and yellow lights strobe and pulse to the beat as the Princes of Power, "Adorable" Adam and "Iron Man" Sherah Prince, and their manager, "Beautiful" Bo Fletcher, step out onto the stage.
Kevin Kim: From Etherton Illinois, weighing in at 293 lbs, he is the “Iron Man,” SHERAH PRINCE!
Adam bounces and dances to the music for a moment, showboating for the crowd, before the trio make their way down the aisle. Upon reaching the ring, Sherah climbs the stairs and continues up the outside of the turnbuckles while Adam slides into the ring and ascends the ropes on the opposite side. The two of them look out over the audience, pointing at the fans and pumping their fists in the air.
Kevin Kim: And his opponent, BRICK HARDCHEESE!
Where Brick had once been flexing his muscles and stretching to psyche up for the match, with one look at the impressive physique of Sherah, his face falls dramatically.
Del Ramos: Ha! Taking his identity as the biggest guy in the room. Fucking brutal.
The match is underway and Sherah motions to Brick, challenging him to a test of strength. To his credit the local doesn't back down. The two competitors lock up. Almost effortlessly, Iron Man has Brick down to his knees!
Artemis Direction: Oooh...I don't think Hardcheese was expecting to be that overwhelmed!
Hiro Suzuki: I think he knee-ded to be better prepared for that!
Del Ramos: Heh! I don't think the big guy's gonna let this be much of a contest.
Sherah shifts his grip, grasping Brick in a clinch around the waist and throwing him bodily to the mat with a ring-shaking gutwrench suplex. The Iron Man flexes while his compatriots, ‘Beautiful’ Bob Fletcher and ‘Adorable’ Adam Prince, clap in appreciation. Sherah lifts Brick to his feet, only to knock him down again with a powerful short-arm lariat. Lateral press for the pin!
1…
2…
To his credit Brick Hardcheese manages to get a shoulder up.
Artemis Direction: Sherah almost took off poor Brick head off with that lariat!
Del Ramos: Yet somehow he’s still in the fight.
The Iron Man shakes his head at his opponent’s resistance then punishes him for it with a standing elbow drop! Or at least would have if Brick hadn’t managed to roll out of the way. Sherah is jarred by the impact with the ring mat, giving Brick a chance to press the advantage! He knocks Sherah Prince back with an European uppercut. Then comes charging in off the ropes for a running European uppercut. Not wanting to be outshone, Brick tenses up, readying for a spectacular display of strength and grapples his opponent for a vertical suplex.
Hiro Suzuki: He's going for it!
Sherah Prince remains firm and denies Brick Hardcheese the suplex. He strikes Brick on the crown with a knee strike! Then a second! And a third! The Iron Man lifts his opponent up into the air, holding him up with one arm and flexing again with the other. A few moments pass with Brick hanging helplessly before Sherah mercifully opts to complete his own vertical suplex. The Iron Man doesn't let up, keeping a hold of Brick to force him to his feet and give him a shove. Brick stumbles backwards into a corner.
Del Ramos: Sherah Prince is practically throwing Brick Hardcheese around like a ragdoll! Heh! Maybe this guy knows how to party after all.
The Iron Man lunges forward, gut checking Brick with a shoulder charge. Hardcheese doubles over. Sherah hoists up his opponent, draping him across his back and carrying him! The Iron Man climbs the turnbuckle and the Tide Turner connects! Sherah turned to lock eyes with his manager. Bob Fletcher responds with a solemn nod of anticipation. The message is clear. It's time to end the match.
Artemis Direction: Prince has been absolutely unrelenting throughout this match!
Hiro Suzuki: Jeez...seeing somebody like him really makes you wanna hit the gym. Did you hear about the priests that started a work-out club?
Artemis Direction: No, sweetling, tell me about it.
Hiro Suzuki: They have a lot of muscle mass!
Sherah has Brick on his feet once again. Brick crumples, unable to support himself under his own power and would have slumped back to the mat if not for Sherah holding him up in position for a powerbomb. The Iron Man hit his sickening WMD and hooked the leg for the pin.
1…
2…
3…
DING DING DING!
Kevin Kim: Your winner by pinfall, the Iron Man, SHERAH PRINCE!
As Sherah’s hand is lifted in victory, Bo and Adam come into the ring to celebrate with him. His first victory is one for all of them.
Del Ramos: That was a lot more brutal than I was expecting. Heh! Can’t wait to see how his cousin is in the ring. Maybe that killer instinct runs in the family.
Artemis Direction: My guess is we’ll find that out come our next edition of Collision! So many new faces to look forward to!
Hiro Suzuki: Speaking of, we have another of our latest signees in our next match!
Kevin Kim: Ascended Army our next match is scheduled for one fall!
Le chant de Roma begins to play.
Kevin Kim: Making their way to the ring, weighing in 99lbs, from Tokyo, Japan, she is CHIBA SUZUMIYA!
The whole arena's lights go out as the music gradually grows. Purple lights gradually light up the arena. Chiba appears with outstretched arms before slowly looking up at the ring with determined eyes. She put her hands down and walked straight for the ring, ignoring the audience. Chiba climbs into the ring and mounts a turnbuckle, throwing her arms out wide. Confidence is clear upon her face. She shoot a glance at Hot Dropkick already waiting in the ring and hops down to prepare for the match.
Del Ramos: Here we go! In her promo, Chiba made it clear that she wants to tear apart the old world and make a new one in its ashes. That's fucking metal as Hell and I can totally get behind it.
DING DING!
The starting bell has barely finished ringing when Chiba Suzumiya lashes out with a quick first strike! She rushes forward and clocks Hot Dropkick with a stiff Superman punch! The homegrown Ascended talent stumbles, rocked by the sudden attack, into a nearby corner. An Irish whip sends Hot Dropkick careening toward the opposing corner. Chiba follows in pursuit, barely a step behind. By instinct Dropkick reacts, swinging his elbow and catching his opponent in the jaw. Caught off guard, Chiba stumbles back a few steps, giving Hot Dropkick some necessary space and separation.
Artemis Direction: Hot Dropkick is looking to make himself quite the Hot Topic with a win at our first ever Pay-Pay-View!
Del Ramos: I'll believe it when I see it.
Hot Dropkick jumps onto the middle turnbuckle, coming down upon Chiba with a diving double axe handle. The quicker by no small measure Chiba takes the wind out of Dropkick with another stiff strike, this one a roundhouse kick to the gut. Hot Dropkick collapses to his knees. Chiba bounces off the ring ropes, performing a picture perfect handspring and brings her knee down across the back of Dropkick’s head. She hooks the leg for the pin!
1…
2..
Dropkick kicks out!
Del Ramos: I’m not convinced our best could withstand Chiba’s offense. Such speed!
Hiro Suzuki: That reminds me of a movie I saw about a bus that had to speed around a city, keeping its speed over fifty, and if its speed dropped, it would explode! I think it was called ''The Bus That Couldn't Slow Down”.
Artemis Direction: You’re an idiot. Don’t worry folks if you don’t see Hiro back next time it’s because he’s been sued by Fox for copyright.
As Hot Dropkick tries to recover, Chiba brings the boot down, literally, with an axe kick, once more to the back of her opponent’s head! However, she opts not to attempt another pin, instead taking position in the corner. She crouches and waits patiently for the perfect moment to strike. She doesn't have to wait long as Hot Dropkick stirs and slowly climbs back to his feet. Chiba Suzumiya with the Last Call! But no! Dropkick blocks the superkick and catches the opponent by the boot. He spins Chiba around then takes her down with a desperate lariat.
Del Ramos: The first sign of true life from Hot Dropkick this whole match. Fukken poser.
Dropkick crawls over Chiba for a weak pin attempt.
1…
2..
Chiba easily kicks out!
The two battling competitors ascend to a standing position! Dropkick strikes first with a wild right hand swing! Chiba ducks underneath, charging against the ropes to gain momentum for another handspring. She catches the shocked Dropkick, too slow to muster up a defence, with an impressive Pele kick! Chiba climbs to the very top of the nearest corner post, where she waits once more.
Hiro Suzuki: Dropkick has been spending ALOT of this match on your back. You don’t win on your back.
Artemis Direction: Well…
Del Ramos: Oh get a room you too!
Artemis Direction: Oh, please, Hiro wishes.
Hiro Suzuki: Hey!
Artemis Direction: Let's be honest, sweetling, you couldn't afford me and I'm so far out of your league we're not even playing the same sport.
Hiro Suzuki: ...Well yeah, but hey!
Chiba leaps into the air, catching Hot Dropkick on her descent with Into the Darkness! Dropkick is rocked by the diving stunner but Chiba maintains her grip around the neck of her opponent. She rolls through, twisting Dropkick around and flowing perfectly into her patented Fade Out! The sleeper is applied almost dead centre of the ring, Hot Dropkick has nowhere to go! Nor does it look as if he has any fight left to resist. Referee Godrick Smith is there in a flash to check up on Dropkick. He lifts Dropkick’s arm and let go.
It flops back down once…
Twice…
Aaaaaaaand….thrice!
Godric Smith calls for the bell! Hot Dropkick is unable to continue! This match was over!
DING DING DING!
Kevin Kim: Your winner by submission, CHIBA SUZUMIYA!
Del Ramos: That is what I am fucking talking about!
Del is grinning with manic delight, eyes bright.
Del Ramos: That girl gets it! If that’s what she wants to bring with her revolution I’m on board!
Hiro Suzuki: This has been an exciting start to our show!
Artemis Direction: Oh, agreed! Our new talent are certainly showing their chops! I can’t wait to see them in action again! We have another fresh face...or mask...in the Colosseum fighting against Mara Lang in our next match-up!
Del Ramos: Heh. I love this kinda brutality.
Hiro squirms in his seat.
Hiro Suzuki: Considering the beating The Pit took last show, I’m kind of surprised to see him having a match with such a short turn around time…
Del Ramos: That fucker’s inhuman. I wanna see him smash it up with Quinn or Frater next! That’d make for some matches worth watching!
Kevin Kim: Ascended Army your next match is scheduled for one fall! Entering the ring first! Weighing in at 185 pounds from Bellevue, Washington, she is MARA LANG!
The arena big screen comes to life with what looks like a network of nerves branching out in silvery spikes, electrical impulses crackling through them along to the strains of, ‘Twisted Nerve,’ by Bernard Herrmann. Those impulses form the name, ‘Mara Lang,’ in shivering silver letters before they burst into brilliant sparks. The lights on either side of the entrance rotate, flashing white beams in an almost hypnotic pattern as Mara steps through to the top of the ramp. As the sharp whistling sound of Mara’s entrance music cuts through the air, the crowd is quieter than would be expected. There is something unwholesome about the way she strides to the ring, not a motion wasted. The only thing that would suggest any distraction from her destination is the motion of her eyes; casting back and forth among the assembled as if assessing them. She climbs into the ring and stands at the ready, arms crossed loosely behind her back.
Kevin Kim: And her opponent!
The lights go out in the arena as "Sail" by Jack Trammell begins playing over the PA system. A single strobe light shines down as Bill Woods is raised from a platform below the entrance stage to the entrance ramp. Bill stands at the top of the entrance ramp in his wrestling gear, his head lowered, a large towel covering his face. Bill's left hand fidgets and twitches nervously, and in his right hand he's holding a nightmarish mask. He appears to be talking to himself, and several times his left hand flashes upward and he hits himself in the face, nearly knocking the towel off each time.
Kevin Kim: From Houston, Texas, weighing in at 267 lbs, he is Bill Woods, THE PIT!
As "Sail" reaches the forty-second mark and the bass drops, Bill dramatically flings the towel off of his head and puts on his mask, screaming at the top of his lungs to herald the arrival of "The Pit". Bill runs to the ring maniacally, his movements becoming jerky and unpredictable before clambering inside to meet his opponent.
DING DING!
The pair begin circling one another like wolves, Mara practically gliding along the canvas, the Pit menacing her with little half-lunges that don’t phase the scientist at all. In fact, watching carefully, she waits for him to try for another and rewards him with a lightning quick knee to the chin! The Pit fumbles backward, Mara following him with a back hand chop across the chest, and going for a super kick directly after! Her opponent momentarily staggered, Lang catches hold of The Pit’s arm and, with tremendous effort, Irish whips him into the ropes! As he rebounds back at Mara, she hits the monster with a discus back elbow that sends him to his knees!
Artemis Direction: Mara’s seen what the Pit is capable of and seems eager to shut him down before he can get any momentum going!
Del Ramos: Ohhh it’s gonna take a lot more than that to keep this maniac on the mat.
Hiro Suzuki: This guy’s straight out of a horror movie! You know, I’ve taken to reading books by braille lately and I have a horror title I just started.
Artemis Direction: Have you now?
Hiro Suzuki: Yeah! Something bad’s gonna happen soon, I can just feel it!
Del Ramos: Did those stagehands at Unexpected Productions ease off on the threat of dropping the stagelight on you if you ever tried performing there again?
Hiro Suzuki: I haven’t checked back recently.
Del Ramos: Maybe you should do a set just to see if they’ve changed their minds.
Hiro Suzuki: Del, it is so nice to hear you encouraging me to get back on the horse!
Del Ramos: Just like, let me know when you’re going to do it so I can bring a camera and a rain jacket for my front row seat. Shit’ll be like a Gallagher show.
Hiro Suzuki: What makes you say that?
Del Ramos: Nothing. Heh! Looks like Lang’s in trouble…
The Pit’s frame shakes and shudders in the ring, Mara watching him closely, as if observing an especially fascinating specimen. But as the moments pass, it’s clear he’s not shaking in pain, but in laughter. He whips his head back in a shower of dreadlocks, his eyes glowering out at Lang from behind the mask. There is a distinct impression that he is smiling. With a thunderous bellow, he surges back to his feet and lays Mara out with a lariat! The wind knocked from her, Lang gasps, trying to get her bearings only for her masked opponent to drag her to her feet, swinging her around and securing his arms around her waist to send her crashing to the canvas again in a German suplex!
The Pit goes for the pin, Jill Kincaid sliding in to make the count!
1!
2--
Kick out from Lang!
Del Ramos: What’d I tell you? It’s gonna take a lot to pull off a win against Woods!
Artemis Direction: He had that nightmarish debut and followed it up with an extremely violent bout with the Lab Rat King and is still able to walk unassisted, so I’d say you’re correct, Del!
Hiro Suzuki: Don’t count out Lang just yet!
With a grimace, Mara’s hands move like striking vipers, thumbs jamming through the mask into Woods’ eyes!
Artemis and Hiro let out yelps, Suzuki quickly covering his own eyes in sympathetic pain! Del, on the other hand, is howling with delight.
Letting out a guttural cry, The Pit pulls himself backward, using the nearby turnbuckle to help him get to his feet again, momentarily blinded. Taking advantage, Mara gets to her feet and executes a swift super kick to Woods’ jaw! His head snaps backward, the rest of him unnervingly still. Seizing the top of his mask and a handful of hair, Mara yanks his head forward again into her elbow before climbing onto the second rope and slamming into the top of The Pit’s head with an overhead chop!
Artemis Direction: Lang on the offense again! She does not want him to get another shot in!
Del Ramos: She might be worried about the wrong thing, then…
Before Mara can get in another shot, The Pit folds his arms around her waist and steps forward, lifting her clean off the second ropes! In an astonishing show of strength, he flips Mara around in mid-air as if she weighs no more than a feather, before punishing her with a brutal power slam!
Artemis Direction: Oh my stars and garters!
For a moment, Woods crouches beside Mara, watching her hazy expression in fascination before she climbs back to her feet. Eyeing him, Lang starts to go for a European uppercut when Woods grabs her arm and whips her into the ropes! He hits her with a Big Boot on her way back, sending her sprawling to the canvas and rolling out under the bottom rope onto the mats outside of the ring! Undeterred, he follows his prey, moving out of the ring as Jill begins a ten count!
Del Ramos: Lang better not be looking to get any recuperation time. Our monster there’s got murder on his mind.
Mara rises to her feet a bit unsteadily, though she quickly clears the cobwebs, backing away from The Pit as he pursues her. Not looking away, she moves cautiously, Woods continuing to follow as Lang puts the steel ring steps between them. He lunges at her with a snarl, but she avoids his grasp and, moving quickly, grips the back of his head, slamming his face into the topmost steel step! Though the mask saves him from being busted open, The Pit is dazed as he collapses to the outside mats, Mara escaping back to the ring. Jill continues to count!
...5!
...6!
...7!
Artemis Direction: As disappointing as a count-out win would be, I don’t think Lang could pull Woods back into the ring even if she wanted to.
Hiro Suzuki: Looks like that’s not going to be a problem!
As if pulled upward by some invisible thread, The Pit rises from his heap on the floor with more grace than would seem possible for a man that size who had just had his head slammed into an unforgiving steel step. Jill almost falters in her count when Woods’ hand slams down on the apron with an audible ‘THUD,’ and he pulls himself back up into the ring.
Artemis Direction: This... does not look good for Mara…
Lang seems to recognize this and, eyes narrowing, decides to go for the kill! Taking a few steps forward, she draws back her hand and looks to go for the Novocaine, aiming directly at the opening in the mask just over Woods’ mouth! Instantly, The Pit’s hand snaps up, grabs Mara’s arm, and he yanks her close, throwing one of her arms over his shoulder while the other grabs her waistband! He hawls her off her feet, lifting her, inverted, into the air before dropping her headfirst into the mat between his legs as he does a sit-out onto the canvas! Lang collapses limply to the mat.
Hiro Suzuki: He calls that one, Embrace the Darkness!
Artemis Direction: Woods goes for the cover!
1!
2!
3!
DING DING DING!
Kevin Kim: Your winner by pinfall, Bill Woods, THE PIT!
Del cackles with delight.
Del Ramos: Looks like The Pit found some serious motivation from that loss he took to LRK!
Hiro Suzuki: Jeez, I’ll say!
Artemis Direction: Ascended Army, I’m getting news of something going on in the backstage area!
??: Hey, camera guy!
We open backstage, a camera pointed at the floor, bouncing slightly in time with the sound of footsteps; one of the cameramen seems to have forgotten to shut his camera off as he moves from filming one behind-the-scenes moment to another and, from the sound of the voice addressing him, has stumbled across Amelia ‘Wildheart’ Winston!
Amelia Winston: “Hey, put that camera on me for a minute, okay? I just got some stuff to say, won’t take long. Don’t give me that look, if they ask what delayed you say I threatened to kick your butt. Don’t worry, I won’t actually do it though.”
The camera pans up a second later, floor then boots and kickpads then up the legs and torso of Amelia, dressed to compete. She has a finger raised as she finishes chugging back an energy drink before setting the empty can on an equipment crate next to her.
Amelia Winston: Ladies and gentlemen, it is Saturday night, we are here to fight and baby, Wildheart is ready to take flight!
Winston is all grins as she looks into the camera, bouncing on the balls of her feet a little, a bundle of excited energy.
Amelia Winston: It’s Ascended Wrestling’s pay-per-view debut, it’s my personal pay-per-view debut and you know I’ve always believed in the value of good first impressions. So first time at the real big time, I am gonna go big. Fuckin’. Time. How big?
She shrugs a little.
Amelia Winston: Six foot nine, three thirty-six? That’s big and I am more than ready. Frater is gonna be flatter than a pancake, Perdurabo will be Per-done-bo when I hit that Wild At Heart and get my hand raised after getting that 1-2-3.
Amelia leans in, still grinning into the camera.
Amelia Winston: Get ready for some fun, wrestling fans. And trainers, get the ice bags ready ‘cause momma’s gonna need a few after this one. But hey, it all hurts less when you get the W, right?
Amelia shoots the camera a wink before turning around, scooping up her empty drink can and strutting off down the hallway as we fade out.
Amelia Winston: I have had too much caffeine tonight! Let’s fucking go!!!
The house lights dim.
The unrelenting introduction of "The Heaviest Matter of the Universe" is accompanied by strobes flashing in time with the drums as Frater Perdurabo emerges onto the stage.
Kevin Kim: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing from Cefalù, Sicily, weighing in at 336 pounds, he is ‘Necesse Malum,’ FRATER PERDURABO!
Frater wastes no time heading down the ramp and stops once he reaches ringside. He reaches up, takes hold of the ropes, hauls his frame up onto the apron, then climbs over the top rope. Once in the ring, Frater heads to the opposite end and paces back and forth between the corners as the building's lighting returns to normal.
Del is grinning broadly.
Del Ramos: I've been looking forward to seeing this guy in action again. After that debut, I've been craving the next match.
Hiro shakes his head.
Hiro Suzuki: Speak for yourself! When I saw this on the card, it made my stomach turn!
Artemis Direction: Say what you will, but I think Frater'd better be careful. This young lioness has some claws of her own.
The lights dim, strobing along with the intro of "Black Sheep", Amelia standing at the top of the entrance ramp, bouncing a little on the balls of her feet.
Kevin Kim: And his opponent, hailing from Belleville, Ontario, Canada, weighing in at 157 lbs, she is AMELIA “WILDHEART” WINSTON!
The first verse hits and the lights come up brighter, still strobing a bit with the tune as she makes her way down to the ring, a bit of strut in her march. She sprints the last few yards, diving in under the bottom rope and rolling to her feet, climbing onto the ropes to cut a pose for the hard camera as the lights come back to full normal before jumping down from the ropes, eyes locking on those of Frater Perdurabo.
DING DING!
Amelia circles warily as Frater stands in the middle of the ring, staring the smaller competitor down as if daring her to make a move. Finally she feints moving in for a lockup, ducking under the arms of Frater as he moves to engage her, turning and connecting with a pair of hard round kicks to his left thigh before stepping back as Frater turns to face her again. Frater throws a big right hand but Amelia dodges before landing another pair of hard leg kicks. She looks for a third but this time Frater catches her foot, holding her leg with one arm, grabbing her by the hair with the other and tossing her back-first into the corner.
Artemis Direction: A valiant effort from Amelia!
Del Ramos: That's the problem here, isn't it? Wildheart has to hit and dodge consistently. She has to be perfect every time. Frater? Heh. He only needs to catch her once.
Frater rushes in, looking for a clothesline but Amelia sidesteps, Frater crashing hard into the buckles. Amelia goes back to the leg, hammering it with round kicks while Frater gets turned around, grabbing her and turning, biel throwing her across the ring, the smaller wrestler launched halfway across the ring! Amelia scrambles to her feet against the ropes, a little shaken, just in time to get met with a massive shoulder block from Frater that sends her toppling out over the top to the floor, rolling backwards til she’s almost at the base of the entrance ramp!
Hiro Suzuki: You know, I always try to remember it isn't how many times you fall down - it's how many times you get up! Unfortunately, I ran into someone recently who didn't agree with that philosophy.
Artemis Direction: Really, dearest?
Hiro Suzuki: Yeah, the cop told me field sobriety tests don't work like that.
Amelia pulls herself back up to her feet as Frater rolls out of the ring after her, starting to favour his left leg just a little. Frater grabs Amelia but she hits a quick jawbreaker, jamming the top of her own head under his and pulling him down as she hits her knees, staggering the big man back a few steps. Amelia hops up to the ring apron, glancing back to measure Frater before leaping to the second rope and launching herself backwards for an Asai moonsault but Frater catches her, pausing for a second to say something to her, a vicious smile on his face before hitting a huge fallaway slam on the floor! Frater stands up, taking a long moment to admire his handiwork as Amelia writhes in pain on the ground.
Hiro hisses through his teeth, brow knit. Artemis lets out a low, 'Ooooo...'. Del cackles and slams a hand down on the top of the commentator's desk.
Del Ramos: Let's see some more of that pain, Frater!
Artemis Direction: Winston is showing remarkable resiliency!
As Amelia begins to pull herself to her feet again, Frater steps in, grabbing a handful of hair and the waist of her trunks, tossing her bodily into the ring, Amelia rolling towards a corner as Frater climbs back in as well, watching her from the opposite corner, measuring her as she pulls herself up. He charges, looking for the Dark Depths but at the last second Amelia goes low, dropkicking his left leg out from under him as he brings the right up for the attempted big boot! Frater goes down hard and Amelia pounces, grabbing his left arm and twisting it around her leg before rolling over him, taking the big man over with a la magistral cradle!
Artemis Direction: Well now! Wildheart said speed kills, and she may just prove it here and now!
ONE!
TW--KICKOUT!
Frater kicks out with authority, sending Amelia scrambling away. As Frater rises Amelia grabs him from behind, gripping his right wrist with her left hand and pulling the big man around, looking for a ripcord knee but Frater counters, blocking the knee with the forearm of his free hand before gripping her by the throat! He hauls her up, looking for the Culling Of The Weak but Amelia pushes off of him with her feet on his chest in mid-air! She lands on the mat, back somersaulting to her feet before leaping at Frater for a huricanrana but he blocks, using his weight and strength advantage to keep himself from flipping over, holding Amelia upside down for a brief moment before hauling her back upright and slamming her to the mat with a huge powerbomb! Frater drops into the cover!
ONE!
TWO!
THR-KICKOUT!
The audience begins a chant of, 'WILD-HEART! WILD-HEART!' as Frater is narrowly denied a pinfall!
Amelia barely rolls her shoulder up, Godric Smith earning a glare of disapproval from Frater before the big man turns his attention back to Amelia, using a handful of hair to haul her back to her feet. He grabs her by the throat again but this time Amelia uses both arms to break the grip, slamming her forearms down on his, then grabs a Muay Thai clinch and starts to hammer rapid-fire knees into the head of Frater, letting out an almost animalistic yell as she does so! After a long moment Frater is able to push her back, both taking a moment to recover. Both rush each other at the same time, Frater throwing a clothesline that Amelia ducks before she leaps to the second rope, launching herself and surprising Frater with a flying armdrag that sends him rolling across the ring towards a corner. Amelia follows up with a running dropkick that staggers the big man back into the buckles. Amelia then runs up behind him, grappling Frater in an inverted facelock before spinning out with him, twisting in midair to drive him to the mat with her elbow across his jaw, connecting with a tornado version of the Marie Antoinette Special! Amelia moves into the cover, getting all her weight across the chest and shoulders of Frater.
Artemis Direction: Good heavens! We may have our winner!
Del Ramos: Fukken ballistic moves! But I don't think our murderous friend here has had enough yet.
ONE!
TWO!
TH-KICKOUT!
Amelia looks at Godric with a bit of shock on her face as Frater muscles a shoulder off the mat before turning her focus back to the big man. As Frater rolls over and pushes himself up to his hands and knees, Amelia slides in, wrapping her arms and a leg around his neck and locking in the Koji Clutch! Frater struggles before getting his free arm and knees under him, starting to push himself up as Amelia clings frantically to the hold, trying to choke the big man out but he muscles all the way up to his feet before slamming Amelia hard to the mat, breaking the hold!
Hiro Suzuki: Hey that reminds me! You know what you call a gorilla in a bad mood?
Artemis Direction: No, sweetheart, what?
Hiro Suzuki: Sir.
Both competitors roll away from each other, slow to reach their feet, Frater up half a heartbeat faster and takes advantage of that, charging and nailing Amelia with Dark Depths, the kick sending Amelia back into the ropes and as she bounces off of them Frater steps behind her, locking on The Mouth Of Madness on his standing opponent! Amelia reaches for the ropes before, in desperation, swinging both feet backwards overhead, catching Frater square in the nose with an overhead kick, causing him to release the hold. Amelia scrambles to her feet and grabs him by the wrist, spinning him out directly into a knee strike that catches him again in the nose, followed with a huge leaping Fameasser!
The crowd is on its feet, roaring its approval!
Amelia takes the briefest of glances to spot where Frater is down in the ring as he rolls to his back before quickly scaling the ropes, glancing down to the big man for just a second before launching herself, connecting with the Wild At Heart 630 senton! Amelia flips over, again pressing all of her weight down across the chest and shoulders of Frater as the referee counts.
ONE!
TWO!
THREE!
DING DING DING!
Kevin Kim: Your winner via pinfall, AMELIA “WILDHEART” WINSTON!
Amelia’s hand is raised in victory and the crowd is going absolutely banana!
Artemis Direction: Unbelievable work from both our competitors!
Del Ramos: Did you fucking see the kind of brutality Frater’s capable of? I’ve gotta watch more of that guy.
Hiro looks wan.
Hiro Suzuki: I can’t imagine he’s going to come out of this anything other than determined to show he’s not a monster to be tossed aside.
Del Ramos: Exactly. His next match’ll be a fukken bloodbath!
Artemis Direction: Well our next match of the night certainly promises to be an interesting one!
Hiro Suzuki: The rookie versus the veteran! Beckett has been enjoying a streak of wins so far. Do you think WildStar will finally be the one to break it?
Del rumbles thoughtfully.
Del Ramos: Hard to say. They’ve both got ideological motivations to get this win. WildStar wants to show he can succeed in this business clean and set a good example for his kid. Beckett’s just breaking into the business and has a lot to prove to the fans, his family, and himself. They’re both hungry - just a matter of seeing who has the sharper teeth.
Kevin Kim: The following match is set for one fall! Introducing first!
As REM’s Superman hits, the arena big screen lights up with a highlight reel of wrestling clips, all displaying a dark-haired man as he appears to work across multiple decades, accruing accolades along his journey.
Kevin Kim: From Wilmington, Delaware weighing in at 225 lbs, he is WILDSTAR!
WildStar slowly walks out and scans the audience. He wears a European singlet with a Jane’s Addiction logo printed across the front. Picking up the pace, he slaps high fives with fans on his way to the ring, even pausing to give a fist bump to a kid in an oversized shirt with his face printed across it. He climbs between the second and third ropes, does a judo roll, and then stretches by placing one foot on the top rope before alternating to the other.
Kevin Kim: And his opponent!
'Stick To Your Guns,' by the Sick Puppies comes on over the sound system and Kyle stands at the top of the entrance ramp, bent slightly forward and arms crossed. He drops the hood of his jacket and throws his arms out wide, letting out an excited roar to the crowd. He looks around to take in the arena before striding down the ramp.
Kevin Kim: From Brisbane, Australia weighing in at 201 pounds, he is the ‘Culture Clash,’ KYLE BECKETT!
Kyle ascends on to the ring apron, looking out to the arena again with a sly grin on his face and climbs to the top of the turnbuckle where he cries out ‘Aussie, Aussie, Aussie!,’ to which the crowd responds, ‘Oi, Oi, Oi!’ before leaping down to the ring and preparing himself for the match.
Hiro Suzuki: Hey! You know, Mara mentioned ‘Echidna’ in her promo. I found out they’re another Australian animal! They’re super cute, too! They have funny noses and big front feet and they’re all spiny like a hedgehog.
Del just looks at Hiro and grins.
Del Ramos: Hey, you wanna know something else about echidnas?
Hiro looks puzzled when Del motions for him to lean. They whisper something in his ear, and Hiro jerks back with a look of horror.
Hiro Suzuki: They have how many?!
Del Ramos: Well, technically only two of them are used during mating, so--
Hiro Suzuki: Stop! Stop making me know this! I hate that I know what I do now!
DING DING!
WildStar meets Kyle in the center of the ring, extending his hand for a shake. Beckett hesitates, but acquiesces, eyeing the veteran the entire time. The two step apart and begin pacing around each other, both looking for the first opening. Beckett moves first, locking up with WildStar! The pair begin chain wrestling, rapidly trading holds as neither gives an inch on the canvas! When they finally break apart, WildStar grins, turning to the crowd and gesturing to Beckett with an expression of admiration. Kyle gives an exaggerated, ‘aw, shucks!’ that masks the way he’s moving his arms. Before WildStar can do anything, the younger wrestler has twisted him around, one arm over his neck, and slammed him into the canvas with a Bulldog!
Del Ramos: HA! That kid’s wily!
Artemis Direction: You know, he was a bit uncertain at first, but lately we’ve really seen his personality shining through in the ring.
Hiro Suzuki: He shouldn’t get too cocky. WildStar has a history of dirty deeds in the ring, and his overall experience as a wrestler can’t be ignored.
As if he heard Hiro, once Kyle comes closer to WildStar, it seems like that Bulldog didn’t quite ring his bell as hard as Beckett expected! The vet sweeps Kyle’s legs out from under him, sending him to the mat! Once they’re on a level playing field, WildStar swiftly locks in a crossface! Beckett lets out a muffled cry, squirming in a panic and pain before gathering his wits and clawing his way to the nearest rope! He grips it, causing Jill to break up the submission, but as Kyle uses the ropes to help climb to his feet again, WildStar’s right there with him. Beckett turns just in time to catch a spinning backfist that sends him toppling over the top rope, spilling onto the outside mats!
Hiro Suzuki: Shouldn’t he have said, ‘timber!’ first? Hey, how do you tell if a lumberjack is lousy?
Del Ramos: They haven’t buried their axe into your skull yet?
Hiro Suzuki: They make a lot of axeidents!
WildStar follows Beckett out of the ring, dragging him back to his feet and pushing him back under the bottom rope. As WildStar re-enters the ring, he hasn’t noticed Kyle gather his legs up beneath him, and before he knows it, the younger fighter has rocketed upward, nailing him with a European uppercut! WildStar staggers dazedly, but remains standing and Beckett wastes no time running at the vet, popping up, and hitting him with a patented Beckett Cyclone-rana! Seated on WildStar’s chest, he reaches back to grab his legs, holding his shoulders down for a pin!
Jill Kincaid slides in for the count!
1!
2!
With herculean effort, WildStar leverages his arms beneath him and pushes himself upward, this time slamming Kyle’s shoulders onto the mat!
1!
2!
Kick out from Beckett!
Artemis fans herself, tossing her blonde mane.
Artemis Direction: My oh my! This is getting heated!
The two fighters climb to their feet again, each of them a little more gingerly than they did before. WildStar is just a little quicker, moving just behind Kyle, ducking under one of his arms, and hitting him with an Angle Slam! Flattened on the canvas, Beckett is groaning in pain and in no position to defend himself as WildStar ascends the nearest turnbuckle and executes a phenomenal Five Star Frog Splash! The crowd is on its feet, screaming for more as WildStar hooks the legs for a pin!
Del Ramos: I think Beckett’s all done here.
1!
2!
Jill’s hand a hair’s breadth away from the canvas, Kyle rolls one shoulder up!
WildStar rocks back onto his heels, gaping at Kyle and then Jill, who assures him, yes, that was two. Shaking his head, he starts hauling the younger man to his feet, starting to sweep him up into a GTS only for Kyle to thrash free, landing behind WildStar with one arm curled around his neck before bringing him down with an Inverted Headlock Backbreaker!
Hiro Suzuki: Break the Cycle!
The recoil is such that WildStar practically springs back to his feet, body stiff before toppling back to the mat! Climbing agonizingly to his feet, Kyle grimaces, expression determined as he limps over to WildStar and drags him to the nearest turnbuckle, hanging him up by his arms on the top rope. Seeming to find some well of resolve inside of him, he evens his stride, going to the opposite turnbuckle before rushing at WildStar and leaping headfirst at him! Sensing the oncoming finisher, WildStar moves to grab Beckett’s legs only to have the rookie lock them around his opponent’s head before swinging back down to the canvas! WildStar’s head is spiked against the canvas courtesy of the Culture Shock! Scrambling, Kyle makes the pin!
1!
2!
3!
DING DING DING!
Del Ramos: Those guys can fukken go.
Artemis Direction: Indeed! And our Australian import continues his undefeated streak!
Hiro Suzuki: It’ll be interesting to see where he goes next. There’s no way management doesn’t see belt potential in him.
Artemis Direction: It would certainly add to the prestige he seems to be seeking for the family name. If he pulls it off, it could be interesting seeing these two go for a rematch with gold on the line.
Hiro Suzuki: Speaking of, our next match will see our very first Emerald City champion crowned!
Artemis shakes her head, scowling.
Artemis Direction: I really don’t know how to feel about this one. On the one hand, Roy really has such a presence about him. And believe me - I greatly appreciate the theatricality. But on the other...I really don’t like this whole contract business he’s talked Davie into.
Del Ramos: Mr. Fancy Pants has definitely shown a streak of cruelty I can sink my teeth into.
Hiro Suzuki: Ooh! I’ve been working on some new plant puns and jokes! They’re gonna knock your stalks off!
Del Ramos: ...Y’know, I bet Valentine knows a fuck ton about poisons.
Kevin Kim: This match is for the first Emerald City championship title, and is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first!
The first low hits of “Shipping Up to Boston” pulse through the Colosseum, with the lights around the Titan-tron pulse green and gold in time with the beat. The screen shows an overhead view of an industrial district, hanging in mid-air for a moment before diving down to the alleys below to show gritty images of hands being taped up, quick footwork of fighters wearing work boots instead of ring boots, and blood spattering against brick walls.
Kevin Kim: From Astoria, Oregon, weighing in at 190 pounds, the Sidewinder, DAVID O’TOOLE!
A lean hooded shadow comes down the ramp, and as he comes into the light David O’Toole pushes back his hood, his expression set and focused. He pauses at the bottom, taking a moment to cast his gaze over the crowd. And as the music moves to the second phrase he nods and raises a fist to knock the air twice in time with the beat, then makes his way up into the ring, where he pulls off his hoodie, tosses it aside, and stands, light on his feet, at the ready.
Kevin Kim: And his opponent, accompanied to the ring by Anastasia Keller; from Cape Elizabeth, Maine, weighing 219 pounds, ROY VALENTINE!
Heavy operatic guitar blares through the stadium. The screen follows a trail of twisting, thorny vines as they wind over a pitch-black floor towards the foot of a marble throne. As the thorns begin to engulf the stone, the camera rises to reveal Roy Valentine lying sideways across his marble seat, legs pitched over its arm. The plants trace a deferential space around Valentine, but utterly consume every inch of bare throne. When the vines finally stop twisting, Valentine snaps his fingers, and the all-encompassing wall of green bursts into bloom, red and gold roses spelling out the name, “ROY VALENTINE”.
Valentine then makes his entrance in the flesh, strutting on stage under a shower of crimson petals. Alongside him stalks his steel wall of an assistant, Anastasia Keller, metal clipboard in hand. Valentine holds a scarlet “Valentine Velvet” rose at his heart, which he tosses into the crowd on his way to the ring, all the while blowing kisses to the adoring--or, perhaps, disgusted--Ascended Army.
Kevin Kim: If Roy Valentine wins this match, David O’Toole must sign the training contract offered to him by the Valentine Estate.
DING DING!
There is no circling patient anticipation this time around—immediately O’Toole moves in and throws a hook across Roy’s jaw, and goes for the shoulders, trying to leverage his height to get his opponent off-balance.
Artemis Direction: Davie’s speed and focus here is admirable!
Del Ramos: If my fukken freedom was on the line, I’d wanna end this quick, too.
Hiro Suzuki: Well you know what they say - the fiercest kind of flower is a dandelion!
Del Ramos: ...Maybe he has an Audrey II to feed you to. I bet he does.
Despite the shot to the face Valentine quickly finds his footing and pulls O’Toole’s arm into a wristlock. O’Toole is unfazed—for a few tense seconds, the duo spin and twirl one another in a vicious waltz as they trade the hold back and forth. Suddenly David finds an opening and knocks Valentine’s arm aside, and in a whirl pivots and flips him in a firm snapmare! Valentine gets no help from inertia to keep the roll going, all his momentum is directed straight down and he hits the mat hard. O’Toole goes for the cover–!
One!
T–!
Valentine kicks out!
Hiro Suzuki: Looks like Valentine wants to make Cact-I + Cact-Me = Cact-Us with O’Toole, and he’s not going to let a few bruises get in the way!
Artemis Direction: Davie’s not letting up!
O’Toole is keen to get Roy into another hold—but Roy rolls just out of his reach, and slides under the bottom rope and out of the ring! His chest heaves with heavy breaths as he turns back to the ring with a victorious smile and a wagging finger… only to meet David diving headlong between the ropes! The two of them go tumbling across the floor!
Del Ramos: HA! TALK SHIT GET HIT! Smarmy fucker deserves it.
Hiro Suzuki: Looks like Roy’s saying, aloe to the floor!
David regains his feet first, and with great and quick determination he scoops Valentine up from behind, tosses him up onto the apron, and in an easy leap hops up himself to drag and throw Valentine back into the ring. Roy finds his feet again in the center, and whips around to find his opponent. The only time O’Toole has relented, even for a moment, and when Valentine turns to spot him, David has a mischievous glint in his eye and a devilish smirk as he shakes his head.
Artemis Direction: Now what does this little imp have in mind?
In a flash O’Toole has crossed the ring—Valentine swipes at him, but the Sidewinder darts aside and catches Roy across the chest with a lariat! They both hit the deck, but David swiftly moves to force Valentine upright and go for a chinlock. But Valentine has his wits about him quick enough that he makes it difficult for David to get a firm hold, flailing and trying to buck him off. David keeps up, but just before he can cinch the hold Valentine gives one more jerk, and he has just enough room to bite O’Toole’s left arm! O’Toole is mostly surprised, almost annoyed, and he thumps the side of Valentine’s head with the heel of his hand. But it’s all the slack Valentine needs—he drives his elbow back into O’Toole’s solar plexus, and while David is stunned he locks the Sidewinder’s right arm into his inner elbow and whips O’Toole over his shoulder! O’Toole lands on the flat of his back!
Hiro Suzuki: Yeesh! That bite was uncalled for!
Del just chuckles, grinning.
Del Ramos: Don’t forget that Roy’s got a lot riding on this, too. In his promo he kept going on and on about creating a legacy. He wants something to live on after him, and it looks like he’s determined to have O’Toole fill the position.
Valentine rises to his feet, dragging a stunned David up by his shirt. He hurls O’Toole into the ropes, and as David rebounds Valentine catches and flips him back to the mat with a hip toss! But before Roy can go for the pin David has rolled backwards and is on his feet, though he’s still crouched and a bit winded. Valentine dives at him, trying to snatch him in any number of pins, but O’Toole squirms out of them so quickly that Godric Smith can’t get in to start a count. Valentine gives David no time or space to retaliate, but it’s clear how comfortable O’Toole is with holding such scrappy defense—and how desperate Valentine is becoming.
Del Ramos: Satan’s halo, is the kid covered in grease or something?
Hiro Suzuki: He’s a slippery elm, isn’t he?
Del Ramos: I’m going to rabbit punch you when you least suspect it.
Finally David has just enough room to shove Valentine away and scramble backwards to fully regain his footing and stand. The two stare daggers at each other from across the ring, then collide together in the middle of the ring and lock up once more.
Artemis Direction: Ohhh I think we’re closing in on the end! Our very first championship awarded at Ascended!
But now Valentine finds leverage, and he forces the both of them to the mat and twists David into a sleeper choke hold before the Sidewinder can retaliate! David fights with all his might to break the hold. He shows no signs of submission; the relentless fervor behind his eyes burns as bright as ever as he reaches for the ropes—and Valentine wrenches him back! Valentine quickly wraps his legs around O’Toole’s stomach in a scissor! O’Toole scrambles for release, but with each passing second he fights with less fervour—yet he refuses to tap. Not until O'Toole's arms hang limp at his sides does Godric signal for the bell!
Kevin Kim: Your winner by submission and first Emerald City Champion, ROY VALENTINE!
Artemis Direction: ...Oh, goodness…
Hiro Suzuki: What all is this going to mean for David O’Toole?
With a cry of surprise and vindication, Valentine shoves O’Toole from his arms and stumbles to his feet. Keller has joined at his side by the time Godric returns holding the title belt. Godric reaches for Valentine’s hand—but Valentine leans over first, tears the belt from his grip, and stalks from the ring with his new accessory shining bright above his head.
There’s a note of apprehension in Artemis’ voice as she speaks.
Artemis Direction: Ascended Army, we have our promotion’s first champion, Roy Valentine.
Del Ramos: Oh, it’s gonna be brutal watching him boss O’Toole around. But not nearly as brutal as our next match.
Del makes a rumbling sound deep in their throat, their smile wide, their eyes bright with a manic glint.
Del Ramos: This is fight is over a year in the making. Neither of them have ever beaten each other. The only time King got a ‘win’ over Quinn was during a triple threat, and he didn’t pin her to win that match. Just when they were starting to get their rivalry off the ground back in Baltimore, they got interrupted by some guy who already had a shot at the title King held, but couldn’t seal the deal. Then they got it started again, but King got tranq’d by Quinn’s girlfriend!
Del growls, fingernails scratching against the tabletop as they curl their hands into fists.
Del Ramos: I fucking swear to God I will personally gut anyone who tries to get in the way of these two finally getting their match.
Kevin Kim: Ascended Army, the following match is for Ascended Wrestling’s Underworld Championship!
The crowd is on its feet, already alternating chants of, ‘LRK! ZEPHYR QUINN! LRK! ZEPHYR QUINN!”
Kevin Kim: Approaching the ring first!
The screens display a flickering, static-struck screen with the crowned rat logo, bone-white over a black and red spattered background as the first riffs of "Hail to the King" begin playing; when the first heavy thrums of rhythm guitar in the music strike, the logo shudders and glitches, electricity running through it from left to right like a broken heartbeat. Below the screens the entrance is flooded with rolling fog cast in blood-red light and white strobe lights that match the beat of the song and of the electric shock waves on the screen.
Kevin Kim: From Portland, Oregon, weighing in at 285lbs, he is the LAB RAT KING!
Where once the Lab Rat King would enter in chains, he now walks freely, his slow and deliberate steps taking him down toward the ring. There's something bestial about the way he moves, like an animated gargoyle; he's accompanied by his wife and valet, Grace King, who seems to keep him from lunging at the jeering crowd with nothing but a hand on his arm and a smirk of her own.
Once he reaches the ropes, Grace cranes up to give him a kiss on the muzzle, and he moves almost animalistically onto the mat, standing up slowly.
Rather suddenly, the Colosseum lights flicker out, dropping the arena into pitch black darkness. Amid the startled gasps and cries from the Ascended Army, a strange sound emerges from somewhere in the ring--it’s a deep thrumming, like air rushing past an open car window.
Del Ramos: The fuck is this? Is this some Doom metal band?
Artemis Direction: I don’t think this was planned…
Hiro Suzuki: ...Wait, this happened before. This sound...during a match between Silvio and King. It made him--
The lights come back on to reveal a new figure standing in the ring. Dressed in a sharp suit with a rose-shaped lapel pin, he wears a featureless white mask, concealing his face from the broadcasting cameras and clutching what looks like a recording device or radio in ons hand. Perhaps more shocking than the sudden appearance is the fact that he has his foot planted on the Lab Rat King’s chest, the mutant monster subdued completely by the noise.
Del Ramos: OH MOTHER FUCKER! THAT’S IT! WHERE’S MY GUTTIN’ KNIFE?!
Several other figures dressed in black swarm into the ring, also wearing masks; they create a barrier between the ring and the security team. The figure in the ring jabs a finger at Kevin Kim, gesturing for the mic. Intimidated and unsure, the announcer hands over the microphone at arm’s length. When the stranger lifts it up to speak, his voice is affected by a modulator that adds a distorted crackle, rendering it difficult to identify.
??: I told you I’d come to collect, didn’t I, big guy? What, did you think you could run forever?
At ringside, Grace King rolls over the apron and to her feet, attempting to rush the stranger. She’s stopped by two of the people in black, who hold her by the arms as she fights to reach her husband, swearing up a storm that would make a sailor blush.
??: I figured you would do that. At-tut-tut. Naughty children. And don’t expect security to come rushing in, either--I made sure they’re busy. Elsewhere.
Below him, Kane King struggles to stay awake under the assault of the thrumming sound; his head rolls to the side, his feral eyes unfocused. He tries to claw at the leg of the man half-standing on him, but he can barely lift his arm. He snarls something inaudible, heels sliding and pushing at the canvas. Whatever that noise is, it’s doing something to his nervous system.
Hiro Suzuki: What is he doing?!
Artemis Direction: Someone--! Oh, dear… I don’t know that anyone can get to the ring right now through these ruffians!
Lab Rat King: R… Rrr… RrrrrrRRROSE….!!
Rose: Aww, you do remember me! Do you remember that you’re my fucking property, also, you overgrown rat? My faaaavourite little guinea pig. How long did you think you could broadcast yourself on national television before I found you, huh? You could’ve laid low in a ditch somewhere, played dead like a possum. But no--you’re ambitious. You gotta chase that gold! And that’s why you got caught, big guy--rat can’t resist the cheese.
He shoots a glance toward the ringside table, where the Underworld Title Belt rests, obsidian inlays glimmering like oil under the warm arena lights.
Rose: So you’re gonna kiss this audacious, tacky shithole goodbye, and come with me.
Rose looks at Grace King, who looks like she’s ready to tear his throat out with her teeth.
Rose: You’re gonna stay out of it, sweetheart. I know about your little bundle of joy--and if you come looking for my Lab Rat again, I’ll make sure little Luna’s disappearance goes into the local news as a tragic tale of parental negligence. Capiche?
Grace King pulls against the pair of hands holding her, and her scream of rage doesn’t need a microphone to be heard.
Grace King: YOU’RE NOT TOUCHING MY FAMILY EVER AGAIN, YOU GREASY ASSHOLE!!
Beneath Rose, the Lab Rat King bucks suddenly in a burst of protective rage, surprising him. He nearly drops the sound device, growling angrily. King aims a sharp and desperate elbow jab at the masked assailant’s knee, bringing him halfway down, but Rose retaliates by shoving the sound device directly against his ear, causing the muzzled mutant to buckle back down to the mat.
Rose: Bad, bad dog!
Rose holds him there, on one knee, the device pressed to King’s temple.
Rose: Ok--my guys are gonna come over here and give you a nice little sleepy-time shot--a little bit stronger than what I gave little Miss Silva last time to put you down.
He looks behind him, up at the arena ramp, where Zephyr Quinn stands blocked off by masked intruders--too many to push through--and gives her a salute, and somehow she can feel him smirking. She bares her teeth, fists shaking with the desire to rip him apart.
Artemis Direction: Oh, my God they can’t just do this!
Del Ramos: Yeah, don’t worry, Artemis, I still got some gas left in the tank.
With that, Del Ramos, retired hardcore wrestler, begins rolling up their sleeves.
Del Ramos: They try and take King, I’m throwing hands.
Rose: Then we’re gonna carry you out of here and head back to the Lab--where you belong, big guy--so we can figure out what kind of chemical cocktail we put into you is keeping you alive this long. Your contributions to the scientific community will be… deeply appreciated. By someone, I’m sure. You’re just a letter to me, Patient Z. So if you don’t mind--
--and Rose is interrupted, rather loudly, by the distorted opening vocals of Lonely Island’s, "I'm So Humble."
Watch out, watch out!
The music fades to the background as the arena big screen glows to life, showing one Marcus Afsah, president and CEO, sitting at his desk. In front of him he has a bottle of cognac on the go next to a crystal glass, and a laptop where he’s watching the show’s live feed. He leans forward toward the camera, moving the gold-rimmed aviators up in his hairline down over his eyes.
Marcus Afsah: Did you call my operation ‘tacky’? Rude.
The Ascended Army jeers. Rose keeps his hand planted firmly against King’s temple with the device underneath it, but he’s twisted around to watch the screen, startled.
Marcus Afsah: Listen, Rosy Cheeks, or whatever your name is. You seem to be under some kinda misguided impression that the man you’re pinning to the canvas right now with your dumb wizard magic noise machine belongs to you. That’s, uhh. Well it’s factually inaccurate. See, Kane King signed a contract when he started here.
He lifts said contract from the desk in front of him, showing the signature.
Marcus Afsah: Now I don’t demand exclusivity from my gladiators--I’m not stupid, I know how the world works now. I’m not a creatively bankrupt old man clinging to decades-old expectations, unlike some promoters in this millennium. But you can’t produce any paperwork proving that King is under your employ, can you? Nah. You wouldn’t wanna leave a paper trail.
Rose stammers, then starts to get angry.
Rose: I don’t care--
Marcus Afsah: Shh, daddy’s talking. Jodie, the portfolio, if you don’t mind.
Jodie Ngyuen enters the frame, expression passive as she deposits a thick portfolio in front of Marcus on his desk. He gives it a pat.
Marcus Afsah: What’s in here again, Jodie?
Jodie Nyguen: Every piece of information we’ve gathered, regarding the operations of the man currently holding one of our roster members hostage in the arena, sir. Names, addresses, phone records, emails, photos, connections to multiple missing persons across the contingent United States, and a few from South America.
Marcus Afsah: Oh yeah. That’s right. Geez, I’m so goddamn busy kicking back in my ‘audacious’ accommodations that the details slip my mind sometimes. I guess we’ve been tracking all of this down since we signed King in the event that a contingency plan came into play.
Rose has gone stock still in the arena. He slowly lowers the microphone in his hand.
Marcus looks back into the camera, taking a sip from the glass of cognac to wet his lips before carrying on.
Marcus Afsah: So here’s the real deal, ‘kiddo’. I’m an investor. I built my fortune on savvy acquisitions, betting on the right horses or whatever. It’s what I do. So don’t think for a goddamn second I wouldn’t go through the steps necessary to protect my assets. That big fella you’re holding down right now? He’s my investment. If you threaten my investments… I’ll happily dig up all the dirt I need to bury you.
The Ascended Army is cheering now, hurling insults and taunts at the invaders in the ring. Rose looks as though he has no idea what to do, but releasing the monster beneath him is out of the question, if he doesn’t want to get snapped in half.
Marcus Afsah: The deal is, you call off your cronies giving my security team trouble… and they escort you and your masked buddies out. You leave empty-handed, and this--
--he pats the portfolio with a hand heavy with gold rings--
Marcus Afsah: --never makes it into the hands of the authorities. You don’t come looking for the Lab Rat again and it stays that way. Cool?
Shaking, Rose puts the mic down--with no other choice, he pulls a radio from his pocket, hissing orders into it. A keen lip reader could make out the words ‘pull out’ and ‘we’re compromised’. He checks his watch, then looks back up at the screen, seething.
Rose: … Yeah. ‘Cool’.
Artemis Direction: Well! Leave it to Marcus to think of all the angles!
Minutes later, Ascended Securirty floods into the arena; they quickly gather the intruders, and one of the guards confiscates the sound device in Rose’s hand. As they’re escorted out to a chorus of cheers and jeers, the Lab Rat King comes to in the ring, sitting up. Grace King throws her arms around him, and the Army erupts in cheers as he wraps his heavy arms around her comparatively tiny frame.
Del Ramos: Yeah, yeah, it’s all very touching but WHERE THE FUCK IS MY FEAST OF RAW MEAT AND BLOOD?!
Climbing to his feet, King slowly releases Grace, dipping forward to allow her to place a kiss on the black leather of his muzzle--then, as she slides out of the ring, he turns his eyes toward Zephyr Quinn on the ramp.
Lab Rat King: I CAN’T WAIT ANY LONGER TO TASTE YOUR BONES, HUNTRESS--LET’S SING TOGETHER! NOW NOW NOW NOW!!
Zephyr Quinn grins wildly--and without wasting a breath, sprints down the ramp to meet her monstrous counterpart.
The two collide at the bottom of the ramp as the Ascended Army cheer their support.
“CRAZY ANGEL!”
“LAB RAT KING!”
The rhythmic chanting leads way to the two gladiators trading blows up the ramp! Neither gives an inch as they reach the top, LRK taking quick advantage and dodges a blow from Zephyr! Using her own momentum against her, LRK pushes her head first and hard into the lightboard on the side of the entrance!
Artemis Direction: My my my! I don’t think those two care a fig about using the ring!
Del Ramos: They’re going to demolish this place and I am here for it!
Zephyr recovers quickly and with a howl of rage charges at LRK! Zephyr drives them both off the ramp and through tables set up below, reminiscent of their first meeting. LRK is the first to get up, followed quickly by Zephyr. She lunges at him, but doesn’t pay attention to the piece of wood in his hand! With a swing, he manages to stab Zephyr in the shoulder! She doesn’t seem to mind as she spears him!
The crowd erupts in chants of, ‘HO-LY SHIT! HO-LY SHIT!’
Hiro Suzuki: They’re not holding anything back right out the gate!
Del Ramos: You kidding me? These two have been battle horny for this fight for what - more than a year now?
Artemis Direction: Absolutely, hunty! These two marvelous monsters… well, no matter how this match ends, I doubt this will be the last we see of them in a fight!
Zephyr rolls to her feet, wincing as she pulls the spike out of her skin and tosses it to the side. She snarls as she meets LRK’s glare. The two collide once again, trading shots as the chaos moves to the nearby concrete stairs! Zephyr gets a running start before charging at The Lab Rat King. Ready for the attack, LRK lifts his opponent up and drops her on the railing with a modified gut buster!
A collective cry of sympathetic pain goes up from the audience, the camera catching a few people looking utterly aghast.
Hiro Suzuki: Oh, my God! Is she still moving?!
The crowd erupts as Zephyr gets to her feet holding her midsection. Seeing this, Kane quickly goes on the attack, chasing Zephyr up the stairs while trading blows. The two make it up to the next landing and jockey for position. With another running start, Zephyr charges at Kane, only to get lifted up and dropped on the hard concrete with a brutal spinebuster!
Artemis Direction: He’s just so tremendously strong!
Del is laughing maniacally.
Del Ramos: FUCKING YES! AHAHAHA! FUCK EVERY MATCH THAT ISN’T THIS ONE!
LRK looks to stomp on Zephyr but she quickly rolls out of the way and to her knees. Zephyr charges at King who is once again ready, flipping Zephyr into the air with a back body drop! Zephyr is ready this time though and catches herself on the railing above with Kane right below her. Without a second thought, Zephyr hops up onto the railing and springs backward with a moonsault!
Del Ramos: Look at Zephyr’s fukken versatility! This bitch is vicious on the land, in the sea, and in the air!
Artemis Direction: Our Amazonian Queen never disappoints, does she?
Kane catches her but soaks up the momentum, propelling him backwards and having him perched precariously at the top of the stairs! Zephyr charges once again and the two topple down the stairs! King’s head bangs against one of the railings, sending a hollow thud throughout the arena! Zephyr is the first to her feet, breathing deeply and holding her ribs still. Down, but not out, LRK rolls to his feet almost a second later, his growls indicating that this is far from over.
Hiro cringes.
Hiro Suzuki: Yeesh! We’re barely into this fight and I’m wondering if either of these two will live to see the light of another day!
Artemis Direction: They’ve both shown remarkable resiliency in the past. They each seem to crave the challenge and the violence that goes with it!
Del Ramos: When it’s in your blood - really a part of your identity - you can’t get away from it.
The two charge each other again, this time LRK getting a slight advantage, which he uses to lift Zephyr up and grabbing her feet while she’s in the air, throws her right into a table leaning up against a nearby wall! Splinters fly everywhere as Zephyr crashes through the wood and steel but amazingly gets right to her feet again. Instead of charging at Kane, this time she runs away from him, climbing a nearby girder to the maintenance platform high above! Not one to shy away from a challenge, LRK easily manages to do the same.
Artemis Direction: Oh dear! Do you think that’s going to hold them!?
Del Ramos: THIS IS WHY I LOVE THESE TWO FUCKERS! THEY DON’T GIVE A SHIT! THEY JUST WANNA WRECK SHOP!
Hiro Suzuki: Hey, what do you call a custodian that works at a dispensary?
Artemis Direction: I don’t know, dear heart, what do you call them?
Hiro Suzuki: High maintenance!
Zephyr quickly grabs the closest thing to her that wasn’t nailed down, a spotlight, and smashes it over LRK’s head as soon as he gets to the top, he loses his balance and threatens to fall, but Zephyr isn’t done and quickly grabs a nearby extension cord, wrapping it around the neck of her opponent and tying it in place. Zephyr grabs the other hand and with a shrug, jumps off the platform!
Hiro cries out, Artemis lets out something between a scream and a gasp, hand going to her mouth, and Del just gapes in disbelieving awe and joy.
As she falls, she kicks at LRK, forcing him to lose his balance and swing through the air by his neck still tied with the cord, creating a pendulum effect! Zephyr pulls herself closer to Kane and yells at him.
Zephyr Quinn: Pass out King! Declare me your ‘queen’ and pass out! Think about that precious family of yours as I reign supreme!
The mention of his family seems to give King life as his eyes snap open and he growls, headbutting Zephyr, stunning her! Using the cord he pulls himself up to the platform and pulls Zephyr up with him!
Lab Rat King: YOU!!! WILL!!! KNEEL!!!
Chants of, ‘HO-LY SHIT! HO-LY SHIT!’ echo through the arena.
Del Ramos: HOW THE FUCK COULD THIS GET ANY BETTER?!
Zephyr dodges an attack from King and rolls to her feet and charges her adversary! LRK is ready this time though and lifts her in the air, dropping her off the platform with an Empty, Hollow, Thud! Zephyr falls through the air as King follows her, the two landing hard on the platform below, creating a crater in the process!
Hiro Suzuki: Are either of our fighters still alive?!
The dust clears and when it does the ref slides in to make the count…
ONE!
TWO!
THREE!
The crowd cheers but are unsure who covered who, only for their questions are answered as LRK howls in triumph!
Kevin Kim: The winner of this match--AND FIRST Underworld Champion--The Lab Rat King!!
Jill Kincaid offers the monster his belt, somewhat cautiously. He takes it with surprising respect, raising it over his head as the Ascended Army goes wild!
Slinging his trophy up against his massive shoulder, he grabs the mic out of Kevin Kim’s hand, scaring the shit out of him, and lifts it to his muzzled face for the first time.
Lab Rat King: Let this stand as a WARNING to you, courrrrrageous contenders--no matter HOW LONG you chase me, no matter HOW HARD YOU WANT IT--YOU WILL KNEEL BEFORE THE KING!! THIS RAT WILL NEVER AGAIN BE CAGED--BUT I DARRRRRE YOU TO TRY!
He then shoves the mic into Kevin Kim’s chest hard enough to nearly knock him over, looks back once at his fallen rival, then is on his way to the uproar of the coliseum crowd.
Del is elated, howling right along with LRK.
Del Ramos: There had better be a fucking re-match! I wanna see these two make a mangled masterpiece out in the fucking street! Or better yet - why not an Underworld defense in the Underground?
Artemis Direction: Our next match… Oh, darlings, it’s all a little too tragic for me.
Hiro Suzuki: Is there going to be any salvaging of this friendship after all’s said and done?
Del Ramos: I’d say that’s Hawke’s decision. Win or lose, he’s the one who got hurt. We’re going to find out if the outcome of this fight makes him a bitter fuck or makes him more apt to forgive our corvid cryptid for what he failed to do.
Artemis lets out an exasperated huff.
Artemis Direction: How can you say that? Silvio had no idea of what was going on! If the blame belongs anywhere, it’s squarely on the shoulders of Mara Lang! She’s the one who kidnapped him and conducted experiments on him!
Hiro Suzuki: Ones that have left him able to control when and if he feels pain. That’s a pretty big disadvantage for Silvio.
Del Ramos: We saw submission moves don’t work on this guy. Leon’s only options are going to be pinfall or just fucking knocking him out. And both of those things are still going to be hard to do considering Hawke’s resiliency.
Kevin Kim: Ascended Army, this is your main event of the evening to crown the first Ascended Wrestling World Champion!
The crowd is absolutely electric, amped up from everything that came before and looking for one last ride before they go.
Kevin Kim: Introducing first!
The lights in the Colosseum go out, the big screen displaying a black and white image of a Ouija board lit by candles and surrounded by scattered tarot cards and raw crystals. A planchette's point moves of its own volition across the name, ‘Silvio Leon’ written in the classic Ouija font as the opening solo of ‘Superstition,’ by Kyle Primus goes careening around the arena. The entrance is bathed in blacklight, a figure moving through it to stand at the top of the ramp, lifting their hands in front of their face to create the shape of a planchette.
Kevin Kim: Now entering the ring from Seattle, Washington, weighing in at 195 pounds, he is your 'Mystifying Oracle,' SILVIO LEON!
At the top of the ramp, Silvio throws down his hands, a pair of white pyros going off on either side of him as the house lights come back up. Making his way to the ring, he interacts heavily with the fans, giving them high fives, fist bumps, and taking selfies as he progresses. He does an acrobatic little flip over the top rope before landing on the canvas, but his jocular attitude fades as he turns to face the ramp, expression conflicted. Closing his eyes, he takes a deep breath, becoming still. Opening his eyes again, his face is calm, posture relaxed but ready. The coolness just serves to bring out the fiery intensity of his gaze; his expression a study of stark juxtapositions.
Kevin Kim: And his opponent!
The lights go out as the eerie opening chords of, ‘The Experiment,’ seep into the Colosseum like poison. On the big screen we see anatomical figures, flayed nerves, and a figure in silhouette walking across a bed of coals. As he comes closer, the figure on the screen resolves into a smirking Insensate. Where Mara would typically accompany The Insensate to the ring, Sebastian Hawke, walking out of the tunnel, stands alone. Flickering black lights illuminate a venomously colored purple mist that crawls out like a living thing from the entrance, wreathing around Hawke in a noxious, miasmic aura.
Kevin Kim: Hailing from Las Vegas, Nevada, he is The Insensate, SEBASTIAN HAWKE!
Sebastian’s gaze doesn’t leave Silvio, and while his loping walk has the sort of easy confidence of a wolf who knows it has nothing in the forest to fear, his eyes are no less alight than the Oracle’s. His desire for retribution is palpable, crackling electric through every movement. He is a walking bomb waiting to go off in the ring. And when he climbs in, as relaxed and ready as his opponent, he licks his lips with a lazy smirk, cracking his knuckles and rolling his shoulders.
Del Ramos: Ohhh… I might have spoken too soon. This? This is gonna get fukken mean.
DING DING DING!
For a long moment, the pair simply stare at each other, standing about a foot apart in the ring. Leon extends a hand to Seb who, surprisingly, takes it.
Del Ramos: Oh, c’mon, don’t tell me Hawke’s--
And promptly wrenches Silvio’s fingers backward, causing Leon to cry out and take a knee!
Del Ramos: HA! Going for the moneymaker. Literally!
Hiro Suzuki: Doesn’t Silvio do tattoo work?
Artemis looks concerned.
Artemis Direction: He’s an artist and going after his hands feels… especially cruel!
Seb grins as he watches Silvio crumple, promptly bringing his knee up into Leon’s face! The Oracle reels back managing to work his fingers free from Hawke’s grip! He moves with the momentum, somersaulting backward and rising to his feet again, shaking his hand out with a grimace. Hawke doesn’t let up for a moment, hitting Silvio’s already compromised arm with a roundhouse kick!
Hiro Suzuki: The Insensate just working that arm over!
Del Ramos: It’s a smart way to work. Take your opponent apart one limb at a time. Leon has a lot of high-impact moves that’ll be a lot more dangerous to pull off if they hurt him more than they hurt Hawke.
Silvio staggers back into the ropes! Sebastian doesn’t let up, grabbing that arm he’s been punishing and uses it as a fulcrum to whip his opponent into the ropes!
Hiro Suzuki: You know, I’ve got this new theory about inertia. Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem to be gaining momentum!
As the Oracle returns, he seems to have found his wits and hits Hawke with a Kitchen Sink!
Artemis Direction: That’s it, darling!
Del Ramos: Let’s see if Leon’s finally realizing this ain’t gonna go down any way but bloody.
Hawke hits the mat and, realizing he can’t let up for a moment, Leon immediately hops up onto the second rope, executing a springboard moonsault on his opponent! He goes for the pin, Godric Smith sliding in for the count!
1!
Kick out from Hawke!
As Sebastian rises, he grins at Silvio, seeming completely unfazed by the impact. The Oracle looks on, his expression that of someone who has just had a terrible epiphany; a nightmare reality he can’t do a damn thing about. His mouth hardens into a line and, eyes determined, he climbs to his feet again, grabbing Sebastian and dragging him upright. Before he can make another move, though, Hawke grabs hold of his arm, that arm that he’s been focusing on since the beginning, and wrenches it behind Leon’s back in a vicious hammerlock!
Del laughs sadistically, slamming a hand against the desktop.
Del Ramos: Leon can’t give this fucker an inch! If he doesn’t up the intensity, he’s not gonna win this thing.
Silvio lets out a sharp cry, grimacing as he tries to work his way free, but that pain is working against him. Seb leans in closer, grinning cruelly as he whispers something into Silvio’s ear.
You made me this.
Leon’s expression shifts, knees trembling a bit as Sebastian continues to wrench that arm, smirking triumphantly.
??: HEY! SEB!
Surprised, Hawke looks up, locking eyes with a young man standing against the guard rail of the front row, blazing green eyes lined with gold, chewing a piece of gum.
Hiro Suzuki: ...Is that?
Artemis Direction: Well, look at that! Silvio's dear little rock star sweetheart, Axton Gunn!
Hiro Suzuki: Weren't Gunn and Hawke in a stable together?
Artemis Direction: They were indeed back in Baltimore.
Axton Gunn promptly flips Hawke the bird, chewing his gum almost angrily.
Axton Gunn: Answer your texts, douchebag! Also get your shit together, holy fuck!
Sebastian looks furious, actually loosening his grip on Silvio and starting to scream at Gunn. Not wasting a chance to turn things around, Leon breaks free and nails Hawke’s back with a spinning heel kick that sends the Insensate slamming into the top rope in front of him. Seemingly wanting to take it easy on his arm, he goes for a super kick, only for Hawke to seize his leg, arrogance replaced by anger, as he hurls him to the canvas with a dragon screw!
Hiro Suzuki: He just… doesn’t feel it…
Del Ramos: Hawke’s got everything going for him for this fight. He’s had it rough in life, and it’s made him more resourceful, and without worrying about sensation, he’s going to be quicker to recover and react. And he’s in Leon’s head.
Hawke goes for the pin!
1!
2!
No!
Sebastian gets to his feet, looking down at Leon, an expression of disgust on his face. He starts hauling him upright only for the Oracle to hit him rapid fire with a series of elbow strikes! Hawke staggers backward into the nearest turnbuckle - just because he can’t feel pain doesn’t mean he can’t be moved. Leon’s teeth gritted, he mounts the second rope and starts laying into Hawke! Whatever else may have transpired, there’s just no other way to win this match. He knows what it is to be ruthless. He just never expected he’d have to demonstrate it to a friend. Dragging a struggling Insensate away from the turnbuckle, arm locked around his neck, Silvio uses the ropes to float over, bringing Hawke down hard with a tornado DDT!
Hiro Suzuki: Starry Wisdom!
Both fighters climb to their feet at the same time, though Silvio is cringing as he clutches the arm that’s been worked over. Falling in toward each other. They lock up, trading holds, struggling for an advantage. That wounded arm gives Sebastian the edge, positioning the Oracle close enough to nail him with a headbutt, sending him staggering, then locks him up for an inverted DDT of his own! Slammed onto the canvas and left writhing in the center of the ring, Leon is helpless as Sebastian mounts the nearest turnbuckle and comes down with a Coup de Grâce!
Del Ramos: Pinpoint from Hawke! Oh, this has gotta be it.
He goes for the pin!
1!
2!
Silvio manages to kick out just as Godric’s hand is about to hit the mat a third time!
Enraged, the Insensate yanks Silvio upright and slaps him hard across one cheek, his head snapping to one side. Grabbing him by the hair and yanking him forward, he presses his forehead to Leon’s, seething, and screams into his face.
Sebastian Hawke: GIVE UP!
Dazed, still leaning against Seb seemingly for support as much as intimidation, he shakes his head slowly.
Silvio Leon: Not leaving...without you...
Hawke’s lip curls in disgust. Rolling his eyes, he drags the Oracle upright, but as he does, Silvio jerks backward out of his grip, catching hold of his arm. He spins Seb like a dancer in a ripcord knee strike that connects with his head! Gritting his teeth, he doesn’t let go, instead connecting with yet another strike, before grabbing the back of Sebastian’s head and driving him into the mat with a one-handed bulldog!
The crowd is on its feet, the growing roar something you can feel in your bones.
Silvio, breath ragged, slick with sweat, spares one last look at Sebastian’s prone body before turning and pointing at the nearest top turnbuckle.
Moving quickly, not wanting to give the Insensate time to recover, he mounts the top turnbuckle, steadies himself, and launches into the air, spinning and twisting like a dervish before hitting Sebastian Hawke with every ounce of that chaotic velocity!
Del Ramos: COLOR OUT OF SPACE!
Not wasting a second, Silvio goes for the pin!
1!
2!
3!
DING DING DING!
Kevin Kim: Your winner and FIRST ASCENDED WRESTLING WORLD CHAMPION, THE ORACLE, SILVIO LEON!
Still laid out on the canvas, gasping for air, aching from every angle, Silvio just stares at the ceiling as the crowd comes unglued!
Rising with difficulty, Hawke spares one disgusted look at Silvio before rolling out of the ring and walking dejectedly up the ramp.
Godric Smith comes to the Oracle’s side, checking on him and helping him to get up. Wobbling from the effort just to stand for a moment, he seems to find one last well of strength still left over as the referee hands him the title belt. Swallowing hard, closing his eyes for a second, he takes the belt, opens his eyes to gaze down upon it, then straightens and lifts it above his head to the adulation of all in attendance.
Artemis Direction: And there you have it, Ascended Army! Our first Pay-Per-View in the bag and our first set of champions crowned!
Del Ramos: Fucking delicious. I haven’t seen that kind of brutality in ages. And it’s only gonna get bloodier as time goes on!
Hiro Suzuki: Speaking of, I studied hard for my recent blood test! I got an A+!
Del Ramos: Yeah? Hey c’mere and lemme see.
Artemis Direction: Goodnight, everyone!
Credits
Sherah Prince vs. Brick Hardcheese - Kyle Beckett
Chiba Suzumiya vs. Hot Dropkick - Kyle Beckett
Amelia pre-match promo - Amelia ‘Wildheart’ Winston
Amelia ‘Wildheart’ Winston vs. Frater Perdurabo - Amelia ‘Wildheart’ Winston
Roy Valentine vs. David O’Toole - Roy Valentine and David O’Toole
Rose segment - LRK
Zephyr Quinn vs. LRK - Zephyr Quinn
Everything else - Ampersand
A special thank you to my match and segment writers as well as my judges for matches I was unable to judge due to participation or possible lack of impartiality. Hope you enjoyed, all!